


Until My Last Breath

by RaeSedona



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst, Angst and Romance, F/M, Mentions of Cancer, Romance, Suicidal Thoughts, mentions of self harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-02-08 04:27:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 33,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12856734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaeSedona/pseuds/RaeSedona
Summary: Evelyn Clark is in the remission stage of her battle with cancer and is finally on the road to physical recovery. Mentally, she's hardly in good shape, but when she meets a man named Adrien Meyer, things begin to look up. Will Adrien help Evelyn overcome her demons, or will she give up her fight before she has the chance to see life's light again?





	1. Chapter 1

Evelyn Clark opened her eyes, inhaling deeply as she stared up at the ceiling. She slowly sat upright and exhaled with a sigh. After a few moments of blank staring, she forced herself to stand, grimacing a little as her body rejected the movement by making her muscles cramp up. She stretched, hoping to relieve the discomfort, but to little avail.

      She yawned and opened the door to her room, stumbling down the hallway and stairs to the kitchen to make tea. Her house was quiet, cold, and lonely, and had been for a long while. The deafening silence almost made her miss her brothers, who had been anything but quiet. The peaceful meals almost made her wish she hadn’t moved away from them to live in America. She hadn’t particularly wanted to move, but she was a photographer, and America was a better place to make a living off wedding photography, especially since gay marriage had recently become legal.

Evelyn filled a kettle with water and set it on the stove, turning the burner on and sluggishly taking out everything else she needed for tea. When it was all set out, she popped a piece of bread in the toaster, sitting down at the table for a moment, exhausted even though she'd hardly done anything. Evelyn had just woken up, but she knew today would be just as horrible as all the others. After all, how could it not be?

      A few years ago, she had been diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia. She was in the post remission stage and was hopefully on the road to recovery, but she had no absolute answer on whether or not the cancer would return. The threat of death still brooded over her, and she didn’t expect it ever to leave.

      Cancer wasn’t the only unwelcome thing that had taken a hold of her body in the past years. Depression had come as well, and it didn’t show any signs of relenting. Every day was a fight for her; each breath was a battle she wasn’t sure how long she could keep fighting. Getting out of bed each morning was hard enough in her weakened state, and having the burden of depression weigh down on her limbs made it even more difficult. How Evelyn had made it this far, she didn’t know.

      Hell, she didn’t even know how she was still alive. She’d recently picked up habits, ones that were less than helpful to her condition. She knew she would die if she kept up with her ways, but she didn’t care. There were few things she cared about nowadays, and currently, her well-being wasn’t one of them.

Empty bottles that once held liquor were scattered about the unkempt house. A sharpened knife was hidden in the back of a cabinet in her bathroom. A blank notepad intended for final farewells lay on her nightstand, several pages torn from its bindings. To her, the evidence of her weakness was obvious, and was too tired to bother to clean everything up, hence why she didn’t invite people over. Not that there was anyone who came to visit her. She was, for the most part, alone.

Startled out of her thoughts by the sudden whistling of the kettle, Evelyn forced herself to stand. Walking carefully, she reached the stove and turned it off, taking up the kettle and pouring the steaming water into her teacup, watching as it changed color. She watched it brew, rather entranced by it.

The way the tea mingled with the water in elegant, swirling tendrils was calming and reminded her of the ocean in the most beautiful, melancholy way. It made her yearn to feel the lapping of the waves at her feet, to drink in the salty sea air. The thin trails of steam drifting upwards made her feel homesick for the cold, foggy mornings in England. Making tea always made her long to return home, but she didn’t have the money to travel, not with all the medical bills she was still struggling to pay off.

      Evelyn’s moment of hazed contentment was short lived, as the sweetly bitter aroma of tea was rudely overwhelmed by the rather unpleasant odor of charred toast.

      “Bollocks.” She groaned, hurrying over to the toaster as fast as her tired body would allow. “Not again….”

      Sighing heavily, Evelyn took out a plate and set the slightly blackened piece of bread on it, wondering why it seemed that even when she turned the toaster setting down, it always burned. Not really caring if it tasted a lot more like coal than a piece of toast normally should, she grabbed it and her tea and sat at the table.

      “To another day full of shit,” she stated, mockingly lifting her tea as if to make a toast before taking a sip. After practically shoving her charred breakfast down her throat, she stood and grabbed the bottle containing her last dose of oral chemotherapy for the week.

Every few months, Evelyn would go in for a checkup and her doctor would give her a week’s worth of chemo to take orally. Being in the post remission stage didn’t guarantee the cancer wouldn’t come back, hence her continued treatment. The chemo was in a much lower dose and not as often, but the side effects didn’t seem to care about that. A while after each treatment, she'd recover a little, but the week and week after treatment was just barely short of living hell due.

She popped the pill in her mouth and swallowed it along with a mouthful of tea, shuddering. She took her dishes, placed them in the sink, and walked upstairs to change into a different pair of pajamas, as she was most certainly not going anywhere today. Thankfully, her job didn’t require regularly scheduled workdays, so she could afford not to work for long periods of time. Being a high-end wedding photographer certainly had its benefits, the pay being the main one.

Evelyn was out of breath by the time she made it to the top of the stairs, and cursed herself for being so out of shape as she nudged her bedroom door open wider. Not that she'd ever actually been in shape, just less weak and slightly less sticklike.

After stripping down to her underwear, she looked at herself in her floor length mirror, scowling at the reflection that stared back at her. She ran a hand over her bald head, furrowing her nonexistent eyebrows at the lack of hair. She had a long blonde wig and fake eyebrows that were nearly identical to the hair she once had, but she rather missed the real thing, even if she didn’t have to worry about washing or styling her hair nearly as much.

Evelyn sighed and let her gaze fall to her chest, frowning at how protruding her ribs were and how small her breasts had become. She looked at her arms, her eyes lingering on her wrists, where she saw her scars, ones both old and new. She clenched her fists as she glared at them, counting them all, counting the lines that marked each time she was too weak to end her life.

She gave up and wiped tears of frustration from her cheeks, turning away and pulling a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie. She sat on her bed and put on a pair of argyle patterned socks, suddenly laying back and taking deep breaths as a wave of nausea hit her.

      “Oh, sod off, bloody-” Evelyn stopped, placing a hand over her mouth and swallowing the bile that was desperately trying to claw its way up her throat. She wasn’t going to let herself throw up the chemo, especially not on her last day of treatment for a few months.

      Sitting up very carefully, she kept her breathing steady and slowly made her way downstairs, gripping the railing tightly. When she made it to the living room, she collapsed on the couch, pulling a blanket around herself and shuddering as she once again swallowed the vomit creeping up her esophagus.

      Evelyn reached for the book on the coffee table and opened it, diving headfirst into the world of literature to attempt to alleviate her nausea. Usually, focusing on something else until her urge to retch dissipated helped her not throw up.

      Hours later, she'd finished the book, which was a collection of stories about Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes. She’d read it dozens of times, but it didn’t matter. She could read a book a hundred times and enjoy it just as much as she did the first time, if not, more.

      Having been mostly relieved of the feeling of impending sickness, she laid down, more tired now than anything else. Yawning, Evelyn closed her eyes and quickly fell asleep, eager to momentarily delve into the world of dreams rather than remain conscious in the inescapable nightmare she called a life.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to get it out there, I apologize if the portrayal of Evelyn's condition, treatment, ect. aren't 100% accurate. I don't want it to seem like I'm downplaying the pain of people battling cancer; that is in no way my intention. I've done research and have written it as accurately as I can, without going into great detail and interrupting the flow of the story.  
> I hope you enjoyed chapter one! I won't be leaving many notes, so let me say now that comments/reviews are more than welcome! (: I'd love to read what you think of Contend if you have the time! Thank you for reading~!  
> \- Rae Sedona


	2. Chapter Two

Evelyn looked into the mirror, her hairless brow furrowed in concentration as she straightened her outfit. When it was finally perfect, she stepped back a bit, chewing on her bottom lip as she glanced over her appearance.

      She wore a semi-formal forest green dress one that matched the shade of her emerald eyes perfectly. She hadn’t noticed until she'd already bought it, but she rather liked how coordinated it made her look. The dress didn’t fit as well as it had when she bought it, but she usually stuffed her bra with a bit of tissue to make it look better. Evelyn didn’t have the energy to go clothes shopping, nor did she need another reminder of the disease that plagued her now frail body. Wearing the same clothes she had before the cancer set in made her seem more ordinary and less prominent when compared to the world around her.

      Evelyn sighed and reached for her blonde wig, setting it on her head and positioning it so it looked real. After fiddling with a few strands, she applied her fake eyebrows.

      Evelyn looked over herself one last time, sighing again. The aftermath of her cancer and chemotherapy stood out in a way she couldn’t ignore, like a massive black stain on a pristine white sheet of paper. It made her feel vulnerable when she left the house; it made her feel like people would notice. Why the prospect of being noticed concerned her so much, she didn’t fully know, and she doubted she ever would.

      Fixing her wig and smoothing out her clothes one more time, Evelyn grabbed her purse and slung it over her shoulder before checking to see if her shoes were clean. Having run out of things to feed her habit of procrastination, she made her way downstairs and to the front door. After standing in the foyer for a good long minute, she finally exited the house, and started down the sidewalk.

      Save for a few occasional visits to the hospital, Evelyn hadn’t left the house much at all in the past few months. Having come from a wealthy family in addition to having a well paying, if not slightly irregular, job, money wasn’t really an issue for her. That in combination with having no friends, she didn’t find any reason to leave the house except for the necessary grocery trip every other week or so.

One of the few things she enjoyed doing that involved the outside world was going to a little coffee and book shop called There and Back Again, which was where she was headed now. Thankfully, it wasn’t far from her house, so she didn’t have to go through the stress of driving there. She still hadn’t gotten used to driving on the right, or as she liked to call it, wrong side of the road, even though she'd been living in America for about six years.

      Evelyn took a deep breath of the cool autumn air and exhaled, looking up at the cerulean blue heavens, peppered with puffy white clouds that glided lazily across the afternoon sky.

She smiled ever so slightly and looked back down at her feet. She’d always loved the color blue, especially the hue above her head. Perhaps it was rarely seeing the sky so clear back in her home country that led her to cherish it so much here, perhaps it wasn’t. Either way, she was glad to have the warmth of the sun on her pale cheeks and the vibrancy of the sky to please her eyes.

Having been so caught up in her thoughts, Evelyn hadn’t noticed that a man walking opposite of her was also too preoccupied with his own to notice her. Henceforth, the two crashed into one another in a less than graceful collision.

“Oi!” Evelyn exclaimed, furrowing her brow in irritation. “Watch where you’re going, you bloody wank-” she stopped mid-sentence when she looked up to see whom she’d accidentally ran into.

He was beautiful. That was the first thing that crossed Evelyn’s mind when she saw the stranger’s face. His eyes were the most lovely shade of blue, ironically, the same color as the sky she had been admiring only moments ago. His hair was a blond and quite fair, stopping a few inches past his chin in thick, graceful curls. His face was unlike any she'd ever seen; it was elegant, yet somehow masculine. His defined jawline was decorated with a beard that was just long enough to show that he hadn’t simply forgotten to shave. His expression was a mixture of confusion and shock, his immaculate eyebrows creased beautifully in perplexity. In short, if perfection were somehow personified, Evelyn wouldn’t have been the least bit surprised if it looked like him.

“Je suis désolé, mademoiselle, je ne regardais pas où j'allais!” The man said hurriedly, looking quite distressed.

Immediately, Evelyn’s heart leapt. He was French, and his voice was positively melodic. Closing her mouth, which she hadn’t realized was agape until now, she pulled her lips into a frown. Evelyn felt foolish for being so wonderstruck; she didn’t even know the man’s name and already found him extraordinarily attractive. She creased her brow in frustration. What the bloody hell was wrong with her?

      “I don’t speak French.” Evelyn muttered, bitter in her annoyance with herself.

      The man’s cheeks flushed ever so slightly and he spoke, his words thickly accented with a most alluring French accent. “My apologies, I didn’t mean to switch to French. And I’m sorry, mademoiselle; I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

      Evelyn rolled her eyes, trying to distract herself from how flustered she felt. Bloody hell, he was polite as well as attractive.

      “It’s fine.” She answered, feeling quite lightheaded, and not just because of her poor health.

      The man’s slight shock changed to a look of concern. “Are you all right? You look a little pale.”

      “I’m quite well, thank you.” Evelyn answered, feeling a little less than all right. Whenever she was startled, she started to feel a little more ill than before.

      “Are you sure?” He reached out to feel her forehead briefly, and it was all Evelyn could do not to flinch away. “Your cheeks are flushed, but you don’t feel warm….”

      “I have a cold.” Evelyn blurted, pushing his hand away, feeling a wave of humiliation wash over her the second she realized how pathetic her excuse was.

      “Then allow me to buy you some coff-” The man stopped himself, smiling a little. “Excuse me. Allow me to buy you a cup of tea, as an apology for running into you, it might make you feel a little better as well. There’s a quaint little coffee and book shop just ahead, and their tea is quite exquisite, even though I prefer coffee, myself. You’re English, you prefer tea, non?”

      “That’s not a stereotypical assumption at all….” Evelyn mumbled, leaning a little against a nearby lamppost as she caught her breath, which had somehow escaped her. “But yes, I do.”

The man smiled. “Do you need help walking there, mademoiselle?”

      Evelyn huffed a little, rather offended. She wasn’t some dainty old lady who needed someone to hold her parasol for her as she waddled down the street, she was a grown woman and she was fully capable of walking without aid.

      “I’m fine, thank you.” She repeated, standing upright and letting go of the lamp post in her indignation. “And I do hope you intend to tell me your name. I don’t make a habit of allowing complete strangers to buy me tea.”

      “Adrien Meyer.” The man grinned. “May I ask yours, ma chère?”

      Evelyn blushed a little, as her knowledge of the French language wasn’t completely lacking. Though the pet name was used in a casual way, it embarrassed her a little.

      “Ev-Evelyn. Evelyn Clark.” She replied, extending a rather shaky hand. She may be harsh, but she was raised as a lady and was determined to act like one.

      Adrien smiled warmly and shook her hand, his skin surprisingly soft. Evelyn pulled away and Adrien gestured to There and Back Again, which was a little ways down the street. “Shall we?”

      Evelyn nodded and started forward to prevent him from seeing the revival of her blush. Adrien chuckled softly and followed, falling into step next to her.

      “What brings you to America?” He asked, glancing sideways at her.

      Evelyn thought for a moment before replying. “Work, mainly.”

      “Oh? What is your profession?” Adrien inquired, rather interestedly.

      “Photography. Weddings, specifically.”

      The Frenchman smiled fondly. “What a lovely job that must be, capturing moments people will cherish forever.” He sighed longingly. “Seeing couples in love and getting married so often must be a wonderful occupation!”

      Evelyn shrugged. “I suppose so. It’s different when you don’t know them, and the secondhand joy gets a little old after the first twenty weddings.”

      “Ah, but doesn’t it make you feel so happy and alive? Don’t you want to run home and kiss your lover the moment you are able?”

      Evelyn tensed a bit, but nodded anyways, even though she felt quite the opposite. Seeing so many happy couples so often was only a bitter reminder of how truly alone she was.

      “What about you? What do you do for a living?” She asked, changing the subject.

      “Ah,” Adrien smiled humbly. “I’m an artist. Not a very talented one, in my opinion, but some seem to think otherwise.”

      Evelyn arched her eyebrows, quite impressed. She had tried every technique for drawing and painting and the like in her teenage years, and had soon discovered that her talent with her hands stopped at needlework, save for crocheting and knitting.

      “What’s your forte?” Evelyn asked. She rather admired artists, and was always intrigued when the topic came up.

      “I specialize in portraits.” Adrien replied. He smirked a little. “In every form.”

      She raised an eyebrow. “‘In every form’…?” Her eyes widened in realization and she cringed a bit. “Oh.”

      “Judging by your scandalized expression, I assume you are aware I meant my statement quite literally.” Adrien laughed softly, his eyes twinkling with mirth.

      “You have to draw people in the nude…?” Evelyn asked, rather appalled.

      “I don’t have to, non, I choose to. The human body is a beautiful thing, no matter what sex, shape, or size, and to capture that beauty on a canvas is one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever experienced.”

      Evelyn smiled uncomfortably and nodded, not quite knowing what to say. She, unlike Adrien, wasn’t so vocal about more private things, nor was she so open about what types of people she found beautiful. Not to mention that an almost complete stranger depicting how he liked sketching naked people was a little awkward.

Thankfully, before Evelyn was forced to reply, they arrived at their destination. Adrien stepped around her to open the door, gesturing for her to go inside with a smile.

“Thank you.” Evelyn mumbled as she entered, her cheeks flushing ever so slightly at how polite he was being. Adrien followed her, taking a deep breath of the aroma of coffee beans and books.

“I will never tire of that scent.” He smiled.

“Nor I.” Evelyn concurred. She took a deep breath as well, smiling a little as the sweet, rich scent of books filled her lungs.

“Here,” Adrien stated, bringing Evelyn out of her trance. He had pulled out a chair for her and nodded toward it. “Sit, I’ll get our drinks. Which type of tea is your favorite?”

“Earl Grey.” She replied, carefully sitting down. Adrien smiled, nodded, and hurried off to purchase their beverages.

      Evelyn ran a hand through her artificial hair, careful not to tug too much on it and pull it off. She sighed in exasperation with herself. She hadn’t intended on meeting anyone anytime soon, a potential friend or otherwise, she couldn’t afford to. She couldn’t allow someone to care for her when there was no guarantee she would survive her battle, it was cruel.

It was bad enough she had her brothers, even though they didn’t seem to care much. Their parents had died a few years back and left them all their money, and her three brothers seemed to be more interested in that rather than how Evelyn was faring. Part of her was relieved at this, but part of her ached because of it. She was hurting now, but at least their apathy would save them from grief when she died.

      Evelyn sighed again, annoyed with her foolishness. Adrien wasn’t going to be her friend, or anything more, for that matter. She’d only just met the man, for goodness sake, why she had assumed they’d ever see, much less speak, again after this encounter was beyond her. Loneliness had apparently made her desperately hopeful, and she hated it.

      Evelyn was startled out of her thoughts as a steaming teacup was placed in front of her, and she gasped, jumping slightly.

      “Oh, I scared you.” Adrien stated apologetically. “Désolé, Evelyn.”

      “It’s all right,” she stated, running a hand through her hair again, “it was my fault for getting lost in my thoughts. Thank you, by the way, for the tea.”

      “It’s my pleasure.” Adrien smiled, sitting across from her and sipping his coffee. He set the cup down and folded his hands, his forearms resting against the edge of the table, and gazed at her with his lovely blue eyes.

      “Er, so….” Evelyn sipped her tea, ignoring how it burned her mouth, and shifted in her seat, not quite knowing what to say. “So, did your work bring you to America as well?”

      “In a way,” he nodded. “I had plenty of customers in Paris, but something was lacking...I don’t quite know what, inspiration, perhaps, which is why I came here for a while. I arrived a month or so ago and am staying with a few friends for however long I want, so I suppose I’ll see where this journey takes me.”

      “You came all the way to America for inspiration?” Evelyn asked, a little surprised.

      “Oui!” Adrien grinned. “Though, it’s also an excuse I’m using to visit my two best friends, Antonio and Gilbert.”

      “Ah.” Evelyn nodded, taking another sip of her tea. “Well, I hope you enjoy your stay, however long that may be.”

      “Merci!” Adrien answered. He opened his mouth to speak again, but was interrupted by the ringing of his cell phone. He sighed heavily and fished it out of his pocket, his brow knitted together in annoyance. “My apologies…. Mon Dieu, I can’t stand these things, always disturbing perfectly peaceful moments.”

      “It’s all right,” Evelyn assured him, gesturing for him to take the call.

      Adrien sighed and answered his phone. “Bonjour?” He was silent for a long moment. “Gil, calm down and speak English, you know I can’t understand German….” Another pause. “You what?! How did you manage that?” He sighed heavily. “…Oui, oui, I’ll be there soon. Don’t do anything stupid. …Just because you’re awesome doesn’t mean you don’t often make careless decisions, mon amie. Oui, I’ll be there as soon as possible. Au revoir.”

      Adrien hung up and sighed again, meeting Evelyn’s gaze rather disappointedly. “I’m so very sorry, ma chère, but I have to go. My friend Gilbert has somehow accidentally trapped his pet bird in the air conditioner ventilation shaft and is freaking out too much to be of any use.”

      Evelyn nodded, rather sad to have him leave so soon and slight suspicious at the excuse, but doing her best not to show it. “Goodbye, then. Good luck with the bird…however that happened.”

      Adrien chuckled a little, standing and pushing his chair back in place. “Don’t ever underestimate an overconfident, unemployed man with a tiny bird and far too much time on his hands.” He took up one of Evelyn’s hands and gently pressed a kiss to it, smiling fondly. “Au revoir, Evelyn. I hope to see you again someday.”

      Evelyn simply nodded, taking her hand back, her cheeks flushing in flattered embarrassment. “Likewise.”

      Adrien flashed her a dazzling grin, and with that, made his exit, leaving a flustered, and a little confused, Englishwoman behind to sort through her scattered thoughts.


	3. Chapter Three

It had been two weeks since Evelyn’s encounter with Adrien Meyer, but the Englishwoman had hardly noticed. For the first few days, she had been quite wonderstruck and rather eager to see him again, and had even left the house without a set destination in the hopes of perhaps seeing him again. Her heart had fluttered with exhilaration each time the thought of Adrien's smile graced her mind’s eye. She had thought of her eyes each time she caught a glimpse of the sky. For a few days, Evelyn had almost been happy. Then her depression had reared its ugly head.

      It never left her, not really. There were periods when the aching of her heart was less noticeable, when the heaviness of her limbs appeared to have grown less burdensome, when she didn’t wake up each morning wishing she'd died in her sleep. But no matter how long those periods lasted, they always ended. The depression always came back, and each time, it was stronger than before.

      It was one in the afternoon, and Evelyn still hadn’t gotten out of bed. She’d been lying awake, staring at the ceiling as her mind churned, since eight that morning. Her stomach growled in irritation at not being fed, but she ignored it, just like she ignored the throbbing of the new marks on her wrists and the small red stains they left on formerly pristine sheets.

      She shifted and glared at the blades on the nightstand, hating that she was too weak to resist using them, hating that each time she thought of killing herself, she turned to them instead. She was sick of it, of being too afraid to go through with the sole thing that occupied her mind during her worse days.

Evelyn was tired of being sick, both physically and mentally, and she was going to cure herself in the most permanent of ways. Tomorrow. Tomorrow was the day it she would end it all.

      She had decided it spontaneously a few hours ago, and had yet to rethink her decision, which only further proved to her that it was the right choice. She didn’t have anything to live for, so what’s the point in torturing herself day after day if there was no avail? She was going to call her brothers today to talk to them one last time, write a note, drink until she passed out, and in the morning, she was going to kill herself.

      Evelyn leaned swung her legs off the side of the bed and grabbed the notepad and pencil from her nightstand before standing and laying on her stomach, pencil in hand. She absentmindedly tapped the eraser against the paper, not knowing what to say. For someone who’d thought so much about suicide, she was rather unprepared.

      What the bloody hell was she supposed to write, anyways? That she was sorry? She wasn’t, and she most certainly was not going to have her final words be lies. Then it dawned on her. Rather than lies and apologies, she was going to write the truth, no matter how gruesome it was. Flipping the pencil around and pressing the perfectly sharpened tip to the paper, she took a deep breath and began to write.

 

_If you’re reading this, then I’ve succeeded in freeing myself from the living hell that was known as my life. I’m not going to apologize, because I’m far from sorry. It’s not as if there’s anyone to apologize to, anyways, if there was, I wouldn’t be here writing this._

 

Evelyn sighed. She sounded so disgustingly self-pitying. Rolling her eyes apathetically, she continued, not caring what anyone thought about her after she died.

 

_First off, I leave everything to Allistor, Dylan, and Seamus Kirkland. You wankers had better not squander it on worthless shit like you’ve been doing with mom and dad’s money. Yes, alcohol counts as ‘worthless shit’. I don’t care how expensive a bottle it is._

_Secondly, I would like for you three to send the nurses and doctors that cared for me while I was in the hospital flowers and notes of appreciation, they were very kind and I want them to be properly thanked._

_Thirdly and lastly, the last several years I’ve endured on this earth have been downright dreadful, and I very much look forward to finally leaving, therefore I have only one thing I wish to say to the world. Fuck you._

_Sincerely,_

_Evelyn Clark_

 

Evelyn reread the note a few times, frowning a bit at how short it was. Was there any set word count on how long suicide notes should be? She sighed and set the notepad back on her nightstand.

      “It’s not as if it matters.” She muttered to herself, sighing heavily. Carefully, as to not overwhelm her weak body, she stood and made her way toward the bathroom. She may be depressed and less than a day away from killing herself, but she still cared about her hygiene. It had been over a week since her last bathing, and she'd finally had enough of her filthiness.

      Evelyn closed the door behind her and stripped off her clothes, avoiding glancing in the mirror as she walked toward the shower. She already knew what she would see, and she hated herself for it. She would see an unhealthily thin body and dozens of scars on each wrist. She would see the emptiness in her eyes and the ever-present frown weighing down her lips. She would see the reflection of someone who had made it to the remission stage of cancer and feel ashamed.

So many people had died fighting to be where she now stood, they had been fighting to simply be alive. So many people had lost loved ones to this disease. Evelyn had a good chance of beating hers, and she was aware of all the people who wished the ones they loved had been as fortunate as she'd been, but she was going to end her life anyway. She hated that she didn’t care about how lucky she was, for disrespecting those who had died fighting the battle she was going to give up on, for spitting in the faces of the family and friends of the ones that had lost.

Evelyn bit back tears of self hatred as she climbed into the shower and turned on the water. It was a little cold, but she was too caught up with her thoughts to care. She was a despicable person for throwing away a precious gift so many had had stolen from them in terrible ways. She felt guilty about it, and almost wished she had another choice. Not committing wasn’t an option, not while she felt like this. She couldn’t bear living each day like this, especially not alone.

      After washing her body, Evelyn stood under the running shower head for quite a while, not caring how much water she wasted in the meantime. It’s not like she was going to be around to pay the next water bill, so what did it matter?

      Forty minutes later, when she her skin had pruned and her body shivered from the cold, she shut off the water and stepped out. She grabbed a towel and hurriedly dried herself off before wrapping it around herself and returning to her bedroom to get dressed. After rummaging around in her drawers for a few moments, she clothed herself in a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt she used to wear while exercising, both of which were far too big on her.

      Taking a deep breath and letting it out with a sigh, Evelyn carelessly dropped the damp towel and made her way downstairs to call her brothers. She didn’t particularly have a strong desire to, but she wanted to hear their voices one more time, even if she cared for them more than they did her.

      After making herself some tea and heated up a bowl of canned soup, which was bubbling on the edges and cold in the middle, she sat at the table and forced herself to eat. She wasn’t particularly hungry, but she almost passed out on her way down the stairs, so eating was necessary.

      About halfway through her meal, Evelyn stood and washed the rest of it down the sink. She was starting to feel nauseous, as she always did when she ate more than half a meal at a time. She returned to the table and finished off her tea before grabbing her phone and putting in Allistor’s number, as he was the only one of them who ever answered his phone, and hesitated a long moment before pressing call.

      Evelyn indolently thrummed her fingers against the table as the phone rang, jumping back and forth between hoping he picked up and hoping he didn’t. Just when she thought it was the latter, Allistor answered, his Scottish accent as thick as ever.

      “Baby sister!” He exclaimed, his grin prominent in his words.

      “Hey, Allistor.” Evelyn replied, trying to sound as normal as possible. When he was worried, there was no shutting him up.

      “How’ve you been, Evie?”

      “Stop calling me that, prat. My name’s Evelyn. Not ‘Evie’.” She groaned, effectively avoiding answering his question. The annoying nicknames were only thing she didn’t miss about her brothers. Well, that, and their drinking habits...not that hers were any better. Not to mention their loudness, and everything else about them that irritated her.

      “I know, Evie.” Allistor chuckled. “How’s the chemo treating you?”

      “Like a sodding bitch. It’s been a few weeks since my last treatment, but I’m still not back to normal…well, as normal as one can be in my condition.”

      “Ah.” Allistor’s tone was soft with sympathy. “Keep fighting, little sister, it’ll be over soon.”

      Evelyn was silent for a long moment, as he couldn’t be more right. “Where are Dylan and Seamus?”

      “Who knows? Probably off frolicking somewhere they oughtn’t, as usual.”

      “Typical.” She rolled her eyes. “When will they learn to grow up and be responsible?”

      “Likely never, they are Kirklands after all.” Allistor stated, sounding amused.

      Evelyn sighed. It was in their blood; at least they had that excuse. Nevertheless, she was rather disappointed that she wasn’t able to talk to them one last time before she died. She sighed again. What else did she expect? Nothing in life ever went the way she wanted it to.

      “Ah, I wish I could stay and talk with you, but it’s late here and I have work in the mornin’. I’ll call you soon, though, all right?” Allistor said, yawning loudly.

      “All right.” Evelyn replied, her throat tight. “I love you all. Make sure you tell Dylan and Seamus that, too.”

      “…you sure you’re doing all right, Evie? You’re not usually so touchy feely.”

      Evelyn almost burst into tears right then. No ‘Love you, too’, or even a ‘Yeah, I will’, just ‘You sure you’re doing all right?’

      “I’m sure,” she replied, her voice breaking ever so slightly.

      “Okay. Talk to you soon, Evie.” Allistor stated. “’Bye.”

      “Goodbye.”

      With that, Allistor hung up. Evelyn ended the call and set the phone down, her hands shaking. Crossing her arms over the table, she lowered her head and rested it on them, allowing the sadness in her heart to consume her alive. That was the last time she was ever going to speak to her brother, and he hadn’t said he loved her back.


	4. Chapter Four

Evelyn didn’t sleep at all that night, having decided not to drink until she passed out. She had been too tired and upset to bother. Instead, she lay awake until the sun began to rise, her mind empty and her cheeks dry. She couldn’t sleep no matter how hard she tried, and countless times, she had almost gotten up and done the unspeakable right then instead of waiting. But she didn’t. She wanted to watch the sunrise, as silly as that may sound. She didn’t want to eat a final meal, nor did she want to live her last day to the fullest, she simply wanted to watch the sunrise one more time.

      Evelyn sat up, taking a deep breath before swinging her legs off the side of the bed and standing. Walking over to where she had laid her clothes yesterday, she quickly stripped and began to dress, wanting to be outside and seated comfortably before even a speck of the sun peeked over the horizon. That, and she wanted to avoid traumatizing as many people as possible with her death.

      She had decided weeks ago that jumping off a building was the best way. She hated guns, didn’t want a drawn out, painful death from overdosing on medication, and would rather live than jump in front of someone’s car. She wanted to leave this world in a way that wouldn’t hurt anyone but herself. Though she knew some poor person would find her body and another have to wash her bloodstain from the sidewalk, it was the best option of which she could come up, even if she did feel guilty about the aftermath.

      Evelyn sighed as she pulled her nicest coat over her semi-formal green dress, feeling a little stupid for wanting to die wearing her favorite outfit. She grabbed her wig and her eyebrows, putting them on without a mirror, having worn them enough times to apply without looking.

      Evelyn stood in her bedroom for a long moment, wringing her hands together, ignoring how much they were shaking. Snapping out of the daze she had been in, she straightened her clothes and walked out of her room, leaving the door ajar to make finding her note less difficult for whoever cleaned out her house after she was gone.

      Evelyn paused at the front door, glancing back at her untidy living room, scowling at how unkempt it was. There were a few articles of clothing draped over the furniture, empty bottles of alcohol strewn about the floor, and had it so that no matter where you were in the room, there was a book within arm’s reach. It looked chaotic, but needing a distraction when she was too nauseous to move was a necessity for her.

      Sighing, she turned, opened the door, and stepped outside. Closing the door, she walked away, not bothering to lock it. Why did it matter when she was going to be dead in an hour? Shivering a bit, Evelyn shoved her hands in her pockets and made her way toward the park as quickly as her feeble body would allow.

      There was hardly anyone on the streets, and only a few cars on the road, which made her sigh with relief. The less people around to witness her jump, the better. Evelyn stared at the glowing sky as she walked, both calmed and distressed by its warm colors. Calmed because she knew it would be over soon, and distressed because she almost didn’t want it to end. She sighed, knowing her reasoning didn’t quite make sense, even to her.

      When she arrived at the park, Evelyn chose a bench facing east so she could see the sun rising in all of its dazzling brilliance straight on…well, mostly straight on, there were trees and a few distant buildings obstructing the view, but in the city, it was the best she was going to get. Sitting down, she made herself comfortable before taking a deep breath and looking up at the sky, visually drinking in as much of the beauty before her as she could.

A soft, yellow light extended out from where the sun was peeking over the skyline, and merged with the purplish blue of the early morning sky in a faint, gentle embrace. Wisps of clouds streaked the heavens above, burning passionately in beautiful, vibrant colors that coincided melodically with the hues the world was casting. And then the sun began to make its appearance, eager to shine upon the world in all of its golden glory. And as everything gradually began to grow a little brighter, nature awakened. Birds warbled more fervently, energized by the rising of the sun, bees whizzed about, in search of flowers, and leaves rustled in the crisp morning breeze.

As Evelyn gazed languidly at her surroundings, a dark thought took residence in her mind. All this, the routines of the world, would continue after she was gone. The sun would still rise tomorrow, and the birds would still sing. The bees wouldn’t rest in memory of her, nor would the breeze cease in mourning. The Earth would keep turning as it always had, and her death would change absolutely nothing. No one would care.

Evelyn took a deep breath, ignoring the tightness of her throat and the slight quivering of her bottom lip and looked up at the sky one last time, silently bidding farewell. Just when she was going to stand to leave, a runner neared where she was sitting.

Groaning internally, she decided to wait for them to pass before walking away, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention to herself. Though, as the person’s rapid footsteps slowed as they approached her bench, Evelyn wondered if staying had been a good idea. Looking up with a scowl, ready to, politely or not so politely, ask them to leave her alone, she was surprised to see none other than Adrien Meyer walking towards her.

Evelyn panicked silently, wondering if standing to leave now would be too conspicuous. Maybe he wouldn’t even recognize her…but maybe he would.

Before Evelyn could decide what to do, Adrien reached the bench and sat down next to her, breathing heavily from running.

“Lovely morning, isn’t it?” Adrien asked, looking over at her with a smile. His entrancing blue eyes widened with surprise. “Oh, Evelyn!”

      “Yes, hello, Adrien.” She replied, shifting uncomfortably. Why did he have to show up again now, of all days?

“I had been hoping to see you again since we, quite literally, ran into each other.” Adrien smiled warmly. Evelyn’s heart fluttered a bit, but she was too anxious to pay the organ’s palpitations any heed.

“Oh?” She asked, doing her best to remain polite and distant.

“Oui.” Adrien grinned. “You were rather delightful company.”

      Evelyn simply nodded, and Adrien happily continued the conversation.

      “What brings you out here so early?” He glanced at her clothing. “You don’t look like you’re dressed for exercising.”

      “O-oh….” Evelyn wrung her hands together. “I just like watching the sunrise.”

      Adrien smiled knowingly and looked at the sky. “It’s quite a sight to behold, non?”

      Evelyn nodded uneasily, uncomfortable. Having someone sit so close to her when she was feeling so vulnerable made her want to crawl out of her skin and flee to where she couldn’t be touched.

      “You know, I really should be going, I think I left the stove on….” Evelyn lied, standing. Her legs were unsteady and she felt extremely dizzy, but she ignored it, determined to walk away without a single stumble.

      “Ah.” Adrien smiled and stood, too, closing his eyes and stretching his arms. He stopped moving when he opened his eyes again and frowned a bit, his brow creased in concern. “Are you all right, mon amie? You look awfully pale….”

      “You said that last time.” She replied, trying to keep her voice even to cover up her heavy breathing. “I’m English, of course I’m pale.”

      “No, it’s not your skin tone…you look sick, not just pale.” Adrien looked at her worriedly. “Are you sure you’re all right?”

      “I’m fine, thank you.” Evelyn insisted. “Good day to you, Adri-” She had tried to walk away, but before she could take more than a single step, she collapsed, and if not for Adrien catching her, she would have likely hurt herself.

      “I-I must have stepped wrong.” Evelyn stammered, standing upright with difficulty and gently pushing the man away.

      “Allow me to walk you home?” Adrien offered, still looking quite concerned.

      “No, no, I wouldn’t want to trouble you.” Evelyn said hurriedly, her vision blurring a bit. “I have an errand to run, anyways.”

      “Are you su-” Before Adrien could finish, Evelyn’s legs gave out, and again, the Frenchman caught her.

      “That’s it, I’m taking you home. Your errand can wait, I’m sure.” He stated, somehow sounding simultaneously both gentle and firm. “What’s your address, ma chère?”

      “I told you I’m-” Evelyn was interrupted by a violent spasm of coughs. When she calmed down enough to speak, she stated her address. “2210 Baker Street.” Judging by the look on Adrien’s face, there was no talking her out of this, and it would be easier to let him take her home rather than protest further and arouse suspicion.

      “Good, that’s not far from here.” Adrien said, bringing one of Evelyn’s arms over his shoulder to help her.

Evelyn leaned heavily on him as they walked, feeling too sick and exhausted to care that she was inconveniencing him.

     “It’s been two weeks and you still have that cold?” Adrien asked. They had just exited the park and were waiting for the crosswalk to signal for them to walk.

      Evelyn nodded, afraid that she'd start coughing again if she spoke. The last thing she needed right now was another person to worry about her, especially one that lived in the same town she did.

      “You should see a doctor about that.” Adrien said softly, his tone laced with concern.

      Evelyn nodded again, not caring if not replying verbally came off as rude. Thankfully, Adrien remained silent for the rest of the walk, only speaking when they finally arrived at Evelyn’s house.

      “Key?” He asked, helping her up the three steps and onto the porch.

      “It’s unlocked.” Evelyn replied, hoping she wouldn’t ask why.

      “You shouldn’t leave your house unlocked, mon amie, you could get burgled.” Adrien stated, opening the door and carefully guiding her inside.

      Evelyn nodded yet again, as she had been hit by a wave of nausea and was afraid if she opened her mouth, something other than words would come out. Adrien helped her over to the couch and sat her down gently, stepping back and giving her a worried look.

      “Will you be all right on your own? You don’t look so good….”

      “I’m fine.” Evelyn squeaked, laying back and taking deep breaths. “I just need to rest.”

      “Oui, oui, very well.” Adrien answered, sounding quite hesitant. He gasped and then smiled a bit. “Oh, I know just the thing that’ll make you feel better! Chicken soup. That always helps people when they have colds.”

      Evelyn looked over at him, touched by his kindness. “No, no, don’t concern yourself with me, I’ll be all right. I need to rest today anyways.”

      “I insist!” Adrien smiled at her. “Tomorrow, then? I’ll be over around noon, if that’s all right with you. I don’t want to impose.”

      Evelyn was about to firmly refuse when she realized how rude it would have been for her to do, so, reluctantly, she accepted. “All right.”

      Adrien nodded, smiling a little wider. “See you then, Evelyn. Feel better.”

      “Thank you.” She mumbled.

      Adrien, after a brief, pitying look, left, closing the door behind him. Evelyn closed her eyes and sighed heavily, thoroughly frustrated with herself. What had she been thinking, agreeing to let Adrien come over and make her soup? What the bloody hell had she been thinking? She was planning to kill herself today, but now she couldn’t, not that someone was expecting to see her tomorrow.

Too tired and dizzy to think about the matter further, she kicked off her shoes and rolled over, hoping sleep would help her feel a little better.

      Evelyn fell asleep, her mind troubled with matters no human should ever have to endure, her heart plagued with a pain no person should ever be forced to cope with. She fell asleep wishing she'd never wake, not having the faintest idea at how this morning’s encounter with Adrien Meyer would forever change her life.


	5. Chapter Five

Evelyn Clark woke to a knocking at the door. She groaned and forced herself to sit upright, ignoring her aching muscles as they tormented her for moving. She grasped her head as a most malevolent headache seemed to plague her entire body and stood, using the couch as support.

      “One moment!” She growled loudly, annoyed by the incessant knocking. Thankfully, it stopped, and Evelyn was able to gather enough concentration to walk. She grabbed her wig, shoved it haphazardly onto her head, too tired to care if it was positioned normally or not, and strode toward the front door.

      She stumbled a bit on her way, mumbling curses toward herself under her breath. She shouldn’t have let herself pass out on the couch all yesterday and last night. Hell, she shouldn’t even have been alive yesterday and last night, she was supposed to be dead right now, not awake and answering the door for…who the hell was at her house…?

      Evelyn opened the door, squinting at the horrendous brightness of the world outside. Before her eyes adjusted to the intensity of the sun’s rays, her visitor spoke and she no longer needed to see his face to identify him.

      “Bonjour, mon amie!” The jovial voice of Adrien Meyer greeted.

      Evelyn’s eyes widened in surprise, having completely forgotten about agreeing to let him come.

      Adrien’s cheery expression changed to one of concern and he set the grocery bags he was holding onto the floor and gently took her face in his hands in worry. “Mon Dieu…are you all right? You look terrible, Evelyn.”

      Evelyn forced herself to smile, though, even without seeing herself, she knew it was anything but convincing. “Just a little tired.”

      Adrien let go of her face, his brow furrowed a little. “Did you get any sleep last night?”

      “Yes, quite a bit, actually.”Evelyn said, opening the door wider and gesturing for him to go inside.

      Adrien picked up the bags and eyed her worriedly as he stepped inside. “Are you still feeling sick?”

      “No, not really.” She answered truthfully. Besides the constant fatigue from poor sustenance and the lingering side effects from chemotherapy, she felt fine. Physically, anyway. “I’m going to make some tea. Care for a cup?”

      “Oui, that would be lovely.” Adrien replied, following her to the kitchen and setting the bags on the counter.

      As Evelyn filled a kettle with water, she glanced back at the Frenchman only to find that he was already staring at her, his perfect lips pulled into a charming smile. She looked away and set the kettle on the stove, turning the burner on before preparing the teacups and tea leaves.

      “I mean no offence, but why exactly are you here?” Evelyn asked, turning to face him when she was done with tea preparations.

      “To make you soup to help you feel better.” Adrien answered, his eyes twinkling.

      “I know that,” she sighed, “But why? You hardly know me.”

      “Tell me, do have to know someone to be kind to them?”

      “I suppose not, no.”

      “Then there’s your answer.” Adrien grinned. “Also, sharing a meal with someone is a good way to get to know them, which helps solves the matter of hardly knowing you!”

      His words shocked Evelyn a bit. It didn’t make sense to her why a stranger would bother going out of their way to help her like this, much less want to get to know her. If the man weren’t so genuine, she would have suspected he was up to no good. But that was what puzzled her the most about him, Adrien sincerely seemed to enjoy her presence. Never before in her life had someone wanted to be around her, nor had anyone treated her with such kindness, and though she had only met the man twice, thrice if she counted today, she wanted to be around him, too. Whereas she was grateful for the company, Evelyn couldn’t help but wonder why he was there with her, of all the places he could be and people which he could be with at the moment, why her?

      The shrill scream of the kettle startled her out of her thoughts and she hurried over to the stove to pour the hot water into their cups. When she was done, she handed Adrien his and gestured to the table.

      “Merci, Evelyn.” He smiled, sitting and carefully sipping his tea.

      “It’s no bother.” Evelyn replied, sitting, too. “Thank you for coming today.”

      “It’s the least I can do! Being alone and sick….” Adrien clicked his tongue, shaking his head sadly. “There’s not much worse than that.”

      Evelyn looked away, staring at her untouched tea instead of at the man across from her. She knew better than anyone did how horrible it was to be both alone and sick.

      “Shall I start the soup?” Adrien asked.

      Evelyn looked up and nodded. “If you want to.”

      Adrien smiled and stood. “Now, you stay there and relax and drink your tea. I won’t need any help, and you need rest. Though, I’ll need to know where your utensils and pans are….”

      Evelyn showed him where the things he needed were, and Adrien began to cook, making conversation as he did so.

      “Have you called your doctor and scheduled an appointment yet?” He asked, glancing back at her, an eyebrow raised.

      “Yes, yes.” Evelyn sighed. “Really, I’m fine, Adrien. I’m not even coughing anymore, see-” At that precise moment, the universe proved to her just how much it enjoyed screwing her over. She started coughing again, figuring her damned perpetually dry throat was getting revenge on her for not drinking the tea set in front of her.

      Adrien hurried to her side as Evelyn bent over the table, coughing violently into the crook of her elbow.

      “Are you all right, mon amie?” He asked worriedly.

      Evelyn nodded, and after a few more moments of intense convulsing, she was able to breathe correctly again. Adrien handed her a glass of cool water, his hand resting on her shoulder as he looked at her concernedly.

      Evelyn downed the water in one go, panting as she caught her breath. “Dry throat.” She explained.

      Adrien nodded, but he didn’t look too convinced, which frustrated Evelyn a bit, as she was actually telling the truth. Due to her irregular eating and drinking routines, her throat was often dry and she coughed a lot more than a normal person should. Her bad habits probably didn’t do anything to help her condition, either.

      “You scared me for a moment, there.” Adrien smiled faintly, looking relieved that she was breathing normally again. “You’re sure you’re all right?”

      “Yes, Adrien.” Evelyn sighed.

      “Very well then. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.” With that, he continued to prepare lunch, glancing back at her every now and then to make sure she was okay.

      Before long, the two of them were sat at the table with steaming bowls of soup and hot cups of tea sat in front of them.

      “Thank you,” Evelyn stated, stirring her soup to help it cool. “I very much appreciate your kindness.”

      Adrien grinned and nodded, sipping his tea. “It’s my pleasure!”

      Evelyn, albeit very faintly, smiled. The aroma of Adrien’s soup was awakening the hunger that she had long since forced into slumber, and so she began to eat. The moment the broth met her tongue, her eyes widened in awe. It tasted positively magnificent. She eagerly ate a few more spoonfuls, wondering how a simple bowl of chicken soup could taste this divine. Had she been so deprived of food that a dish this plain made her want to sing with delight, or was Adrien that good of a cook?

      “How is it?” Adrien asked, smiling a bit as he fed himself a spoonful of soup.

      “It’s bloody fantastic.” She said, a little embarrassed at how unintentionally genuine her reply was.

      “I’m glad you like it,” Adrien chuckled softly and then teased, “the recipe has been in the family for generations.”

      Evelyn nodded, too busy eating to reply. She was being extremely discourteous, but the food was too good and she was too hungry to care. Before Adrien was halfway through his bowl, Evelyn was done. She was just about to ask if she could have another helping when Adrien spoke up.

      “Done already?” He grinned. “If you’re still hungry, help yourself, mon amie! There’s plenty.”

      “Thank you.” Evelyn replied, standing. She ladled more soup into her bowl and sat back down after refilling both of their teacups.

      “So, what do you think of America?” Adrien asked. “Surely you can’t hate it too much; you’re still here, after all.”

      “Just because I’m still here doesn’t mean I enjoy it.” She rolled her eyes, eating angrily. “This country is full of overweight, moronic twits whose intelligence has been so diluted, they genuinely think the abomination known as McDonald’s serves actual food instead of greasy, artificially flavored shit.” Despite her harsh words, Evelyn was actually rather fond of America, though she'd sooner die than admit it to anyone, especially herself.

      Adrien simply laughed. “I’m afraid I must agree with you there. This country’s idea of cuisine concerns me, it’s no wonder there’s such an issue with obesity among its citizens.”

      Evelyn opened her mouth to reply, but closed it a second later, clamping a hand over her lips as she felt a wave of nausea course through her body, forcing the food in her stomach back up through her throat. She tried to swallow it down to where it belonged, but to no avail. Her lunch was going to make reappearance whether she wanted it to or not.

      Evelyn jumped out of her chair and fled to the bathroom, making it there just in time to roughly disgorge the soup and tea she had consumed that day into the toilet.

As she heaved her stomach’s contents into the porcelain bowl that no human should ever have to see so intimately, she inwardly cursed herself. The soup had been so good that she'd forgotten to pace herself. This was the first time she had eaten a normally sized meal, even if it was just soup, in a while, and due to having devoured it so quickly, her body freaked out.

      “Mon Dieu, are you all right?” Adrien asked when she had finally stopped retching.

      Evelyn wiped the bile from her chin and flushed the toilet, standing shakily as she leaned heavily on the bathroom counter for support. “Must have been something in the soup.” She said, feeling slightly guilty for using it as an excuse.

      “Je suis désolé.” Adrien apologized, his brow furrowed in concern. “Here, let me help…you don’t look well enough to be walking alone at the moment.” He stepped forward and slung one of her arms over his shoulders.

      Evelyn mumbled a few words of thanks and let Adrien help her to the living room. They made it there without any difficulties, and once Evelyn was sat comfortably on the couch, she became suddenly aware of the state of the room. It hadn’t seemed so bad when it was just her there, but now that there was another person standing in the midst of the mess, she felt extremely self-conscious about it.

      “Not to be rude, but I do hope you didn’t drink all of that….” Adrien stated gently, gesturing to a cluster of empty alcohol bottles.

      Evelyn shook her head. “No, no, I don’t drink. My brothers visited a few days ago and I haven’t gotten around to cleaning up yet. They’re quite the messy bunch.” They were lies…well, most of it. Technically, she didn’t drink. She had the occasional glass of whiskey, but that didn’t make her a drinker…even if ‘occasional’ was a little less infrequent than the definition suggested.

      Adrien nodded, though there was a glint in his eyes that made Evelyn suspect that he wasn’t quite convinced. “I can clean up a bit for you if you’d like,” he offered.

      Evelyn shook her head, ignoring that the movement made her nausea worse. “No, no, I couldn’t possibly let you. I’ll get around to it eventually. Thank you, though.”

      Adrien nodded again. “Is there anything I can get you? Water? A cool towel?”

      “Actually, I think what I need now is rest….” She trailed off, hoping she got the hint, as she already felt bad enough for indirectly saying he should leave and wanted to avoid saying it outright.

      “Ah, oui, you’re probably right.” He smiled sadly. “I’ll clean up my mess and then I’ll be off.”

      Evelyn nodded, and with that, Adrien returned to the kitchen and began to wash the dishes. Evelyn lay back on the couch and closed her eyes, swearing that she wasn’t going to let herself fall asleep…which, naturally, was exactly what she did.

* * *

Hours later, Evelyn woke, feeling a lot better than she had earlier. She sat upright and blinked rapidly, clearing up her slightly blurry vision. It wasn’t until she was rubbing her eyes and yawning that she realized she had fallen asleep.

      “Oh, bollocks….” She cursed under her breath, jumping up and hurrying to the kitchen. To her disappointment, it was empty. Evelyn sighed and took off her wig and tossed it onto the table, tired of wearing it. Why she had hoped Adrien was still there, she didn’t know. The man had done enough for her already, and she felt selfish for wishing she had stayed.

      Her stomach rumbled and she sighed again, walking over to the fridge to see what food she may or may not have. As usual, it was empty except for an old carton of likely expired milk and a few various items, none of which sounded appetizing.

      “I really need to go to the store.” Evelyn muttered to herself as she closed the fridge, walking over to try her luck with her cabinets instead. Before she could open one, she saw a piece of paper on the counter, and picked it up curiously. Adrien had left her a note. In very elegant penmanship that was quite pleasant to look at, he had written,

 

_Evelyn,_

_You fell asleep before I could say goodbye, so I opted to write you a brief note instead of disturbing you. Thank you very much for the lovely afternoon, I enjoyed myself quite a bit and hope you did as well!_

_Feel better, mon amie. If you need anything at all, I wrote my cell phone number on the back of this paper. Don’t hesitate to call me anytime._

_Sincerely,_

_Adrien Meyer_

 

Evelyn flipped the note over and smiled a bit when she saw that indeed, his number had been written on the back. She thought of having to call him and apologize for her rudeness and felt a little pleased; the opportunity was perfect for her to pose the idea that they get together again sometime…if Adrien wanted to, that is. She reread the note several times, completely oblivious to the blush dusting her cheeks.

Evelyn went about the rest of her day in a slightly numb haze. She didn’t quite know how to feel about the situation. Thoughts of darker things still drifted about in her mind, but she found herself nudging them away instead of dwelling on them. She had something else to think about now, and for as long as she could, she was going to cling to that.


	6. Chapter Six

It had been four days since Adrien came to Evelyn’s house and made her soup, and four days since she had, slowly but surely, started to take care of herself again. Evelyn was starting to eat more regularly, though in very small portions, and had cleaned up her house so that it looked as neat and tidy as it had been before she stopped bothering to pick up after herself. She had been improving in several ways and was oddly pleased, albeit a little puzzled. But biggest of all, which was strangely the thing Evelyn should have noticed right away, was the fact that not once in the past four days had she genuinely considered planning another suicide attempt.

     Perhaps it was because Evelyn’s mind was too occupied with other matters, the main one being a certain blue eyed Frenchman, or perhaps it was because she had finally broken free from the clutches of this wave of depression. On some level, she was aware of her thoughts being in less dark places, but she wanted to avoid pondering that too deeply, lest she jinx it.

     Evelyn had been almost happy in the past four days, her mood improving a little more each time she got a text from Adrien. She was rather excited to finally have someone to talk to after being alone for so many years, and was quite looking forward to meeting him that evening.

     The very evening after Adrien had made her soup, Evelyn had called him, and the two had talked for almost an hour. At the end of their conversation, just when Evelyn had started to feel foolish for hoping she'd want to see her again, Adrien brought up the idea of them meeting up sometime soon, and they decided on There and Back Again, Evelyn’s favorite place, and were going there that evening.

     In her eagerness to be ready in time, Evelyn leapt out of bed the moment her eyes opened. In her momentary exuberance, her weakened physical condition slipped her mind and she nearly passed out at the sudden movement. Sitting carefully back down on her bed, she caught her breath and inwardly cursed her poor health and the reasons behind it. Even before she got cancer, she hadn’t been very in shape at all, quite the opposite, in fact. She’d been borderline stick-like since she was a kid, despite being an extremely chubby infant, and even when she became an adult was still unable to gain any weight, whether it be muscle or fat. Of course, the leukemia only made that worse. Instead of being abnormally thin, she looked anorexic.

     After a minute or so of resting, Evelyn slowly stood and made her way to the kitchen to make breakfast and tea. She had finally gone to the store and restocked her fridge and cabinets a day or so ago and was starting to have regular meals again, even though her portions were still rather small. She was being careful, as she didn’t want to overeat and make herself sick again like she did with Adrien’s soup. It had tasted wonderful the first time, yes, but positively vulgar the second time, as food often did when making a return trip up through the pipe it was supposed to be going down.

     Evelyn put a kettle on to boil and began to make breakfast. After popping a piece of bread in the toaster, she cracked two eggs into a pan and fetched a spatula to flip them...or whatever you were supposed to do to eggs. She never quite figured out how she was supposed to make them, so the result was often a mess of burned bits and underdone goo. Whereas the eggs rarely resembled anything close to what they were supposed to look like and her toast was often burnt beyond recognition, she thought she was a rather good cook for having never been properly taught. Evelyn's mother had attempted to give her cooking lessons when she had expressed an interest in baking, but had later forbade her from using the kitchen after she had made a few terrible mistakes, such as using cayenne pepper instead of cinnamon when baking cupcakes, and then using flour instead of powdered sugar when making the icing. Unfortunately, by the time Evelyn had realized her mistake, she had already baked and iced each cupcake, having refused to taste them, or let anyone else do so, until they were finished. Her brothers still hadn’t let her forget about the ordeal, and quite enjoyed reminding her of it, along with her other culinary mistakes. Really, though, how was she supposed to know that yeast couldn’t be substituted by cornstarch, especially when making bread? They look virtually the same!

     Evelyn’s thoughts were interrupted by the shrill wailing of the device that so kindly reminded her that her food had perhaps been cooking a little too long; more commonly known as the smoke alarm. Spinning around to check what was making the alarm go off, she shrieked in a rather undignified way when she saw that the toaster was on fire. Hurriedly snatching up the spatula she had earlier been using to nudge her eggs around, she dashed toward the toaster and yanked the cord out of the outlet before using the spatula to ungracefully shove it into the sink, where she proceeded to turn on the tap and douse the flaming appliance. The fire hissed as it bit back at the water’s attempts to kill it, but in the end, the faucet vanquished the smoldering toaster.

     Sighing a little in relief, Evelyn waved away the smoke with the utensil in hand and coughed as she stepped away. She was having a hard enough time catching her breath already, and the smoke wasn’t helping. Grumbling to herself, she dragged a chair over to where the alarm was and stood atop it, using the spatula to poke the button to silence it. Carefully stepping down, she paused a moment stared at the utensil in her hand, getting the unnerving feeling of having forgotten something she likely shouldn’t’ve. Shrugging, she returned the chair to its rightful place only to discover that the thing she had momentarily forgotten was, in fact, on fire.

     “Bollocks!” Evelyn cursed loudly, panicking and lurching forward to deal with the second fire of the day. Grabbing the pan, which was angrily spitting out flames and pieces of egg, she hurriedly crossed the kitchen and dumped it in the sink, giving it the same unconventional spa treatment she did the toaster. The pan sizzled and smoked for several seconds before it calmed down enough for her to shut the water back off without fear that the fire would reignite. Groaning in irritation, Evelyn ran a hand over her bald head, pausing a moment, as she was still not quite used to not feeling her hair between her fingers. Sighing heavily, she glanced down at the ruined toaster and pan holding two blackened lumps that looked more like little piles of coal than eggs.

     “Bloody hell, are you don-” Before she could finish her sentence, the kettle announced that it was finished boiling its water by screeching loudly and interrupting her brief moment of peace.

     “Are you fucking kidding me?!” She exclaimed, stomping over to the stove and flicking off the burner as she lifted the kettle and slammed it down on the counter. “Shut up!”

     The screeching quieted, and Evelyn felt rather satisfied, pretending it had silenced because of her command rather than because she had removed it from its heat source. Sighing yet again, she slumped against the counter, rather drained from the unexpected disarray. How she'd managed to ruin three, now four, toasters in the span of a year was beyond her. Rather than admitting she might be at fault, she did the more logical thing and blamed her misfortune on American manufacturing companies, which, in her opinion, were total rubbish at making reliable products.

     Giving up on the idea of going through the trouble of cooking something, Evelyn finished making tea and fixed herself a bowl of cereal. She didn’t want to take the chance of further risking her safety in attempting something complex, like oatmeal. A little annoyed at the smell of blackened eggs and toast, she sipped her tea and ate her cereal with a scowl, her hairless brow creased in irritation all the while.

* * *

The time between when Evelyn woke up to when she left the house to meet Adrien had dragged on far longer than it ought have, and she had very nearly lost her mind waiting. It as now seven in the evening, and she sat on the couch, all ready to go. Due to nervousness and her body’s intolerance to eating normal portions of food, Evelyn had hardly eaten anything for dinner and was hoping that wasn’t why she was feeling a little lightheaded, as she didn’t want to pass out on her way to or home from There and Back Again. Even though she rarely lost consciousness because of her poor health, she still fretted about it, all thanks to her habit of imagining completely improbable scenarios that might happen and interrupt an event she anticipated.

     Glancing at the clock, she sighed and stood, smoothing out nonexistent creases in her clothing. Seven thirteen wasn’t too terribly early to leave for a meeting at eight at a place five minutes away, right? After all, it wasn’t just a coffee shop, it sold books, too, and even though she already had quite the hoard, she was more than willing to buy another to entertain herself until Adrien arrived. Conveniently, Evelyn believed that books were one of the few things one could never have too many of, so adding another to her vast conglomeration of literature would hardly be a problem.

     Stepping outside, she made sure that the door was properly locked and took a deep breath before starting down the sidewalk. Evelyn donned her coat as she walked, shivering a little as she crossed her arms to help maintain warmth. Her body wasn’t as resistant to the rather harsh chill of the fall weather as she hoped it would be, which likely meant she would freeze her skinny arse off come wintertime. She had been dreading winter for a while now, since it would be her first one being as unnaturally thin as she was now, as she had lost the meager amounts of fat and muscle she had over the course of the current year.

     Crossing her arms, Evelyn quickened her pace a bit, hoping faster movements would help warm her up. Sighing heavily, she stared down at her feet as she walked, feeling quite lonely. At the moment, she wanted nothing more than to be hugged, her body longing for the physical and emotional warmth a loving embrace brought. It had been far too long since she had last been hugged, and though she would never dare say it aloud, she rather missed the feeling of having another human so close.

     Before she had a chance to get lost too deeply in her thoughts, Evelyn arrived at There and Back Again. Trying her best to ignore the butterflies fluttering about in her stomach, which shouldn’t even be there, as she wasn’t going to see Adrien until eight, she opened the door and stepped inside. As usual, the quaint shop was pleasantly warm, so she shrugged off her coat and draped it over her arm. Closing her eyes and inhaling deeply, she smiled a little as the sweet, rich scent of books mingled with the aroma of brewing coffee filled her lungs, the familiar taste of the air making her feel more at home than her own residence did.

     Evelyn exhaled and opened her eyes, her moment of blissful peace interrupted by shock when she saw who was sitting a little ways away from where she stood. Apparently, she wasn’t the only one who had decided to come early, for the man who sat, engrossed in a book, was none other than Adrien.

     For a moment, Evelyn simply stared at him, albeit shocked, rather intrigued at how different looked when concentrating so deeply. Adrien’s immaculate brow was creased ever so slightly in what Evelyn inferred was concern for the main character of the novel he was so captivated in. His entrancing blue eyes were filled with a subdued passion as they eagerly devoured the words he seemed to be clinging to so desperately. The way his emotions showed through in his eyes coincided quite beautifully with his tranquil expression, and Evelyn, not wanting to disturb him, considered pretending she hadn’t seen him and wandering around the shelves of books for a while instead.

     However, before the Brit could decide, a clumsy barista stumbled and dropped her tray, causing the empty coffee cup balance atop it to fall to the ground and shatter. Startled by the loud, unexpected sound, Adrien’s concentration was broken and he looked up from his book. Due to Evelyn having been staring at him, the two found themselves looking directly into the other’s eyes.

     Evelyn, quite embarrassed to have been caught so rudely staring at Adrien, looked away, whereas the Frenchman simply set his book down, stood, and walked over to her, smiling broadly.

     “I didn’t expect to see you this early, mon amie!” He exclaimed, looking positively delighted.

     “Nor I you.” Evelyn answered. Hoping her cheeks weren’t too obviously flushed, she met his eyes and smiled a little.

     “What brings you here so soon?” Adrien asked, pulling out a chair for her at the table he had been sitting at. Evelyn, a little flattered by his politeness, nodded a thank you to him as she sat. Adrien winked, making the fading blush on her cheeks return full force, and took the seat across from her.

     Evelyn cleared her throat and answered his question, recovering quickly from her moment of flusterment. “I was rather bored at home and thought I’d come here, buy a book, and read until you arrived.”

     “Ah, a much more relaxed reason than mine.” Adrien laughed softly and elaborated when Evelyn raised an eyebrow. “One of my roommates, Antonio, is away at his girlfriend’s house, so my other roommate, Gilbert, practically forced me to leave so he could have a quiet dinner with his own. Knowing Gilbert, I don’t expect they’ll be doing much eating.” Adrien smirked. “Not real food, anyway. Likely more along the lines of whipped cream.”

     Evelyn was a bit shocked at his rather suggestive comment, and blinked a few times, surprised by his bluntness. “Lovely,” she grimaced.

     “You’ve my apologies.” Adrien laughed softly, a slight blush dusting his cheeks. “I did not intend to make you feel uncomfortable.”

     “No, no, it’s quite all right,” Evelyn said quickly. “I’m simply not used to social interaction, especially not with one so...blunt.”

     “‘Blunt’?” Adrien smiled a bit. “I see no reason to treat sex and romance as forbidden subjects one should avoid conversing about or mentioning. Love is beautiful, and I do not think such a thing should not be treated so secretively.”

     Evelyn, slightly surprised by the unexpected passionate words, realized how rude her previous reply sounded. “I apologize, that didn’t come out as intended. ‘Blunt’ was a rather harsh way of putting it.”

     “There’s no need to apologize!” He grinned widely. “You are not the first I’ve shocked in such a way. But never mind that, how are you feeling? You look quite a bit better than you did when we last spoke face to face.”

     “I’m well, thank you. Tired, but that’s to be expected when one is-” Evelyn stopped herself, looking away as if it would help conceal the words she almost let slip.

     “When one is…?” Adrien prompted, raising an eyebrow.

     “When one is an avid reader.” She said, hoping hastily thought up excuse was genuine enough to sate Adrien’s curiosity. “I often find myself awake at horrifyingly early, or late, depending how you view things, hours due to unexpected plot twists.”

     Adrien frowned a bit. “Whereas reading is a wonderful hobby, you shouldn’t let it affect your health in such a way, mon amie...I’ve noticed you always look awfully sick.” He added quietly.

     “Yes, yes, I know, but it was a particularly good book and I simply couldn’t bring myself to put it down.”

     “What book? I would very much like to read a book you enjoyed so thoroughly.” Whereas his words seemed rather sincere, Evelyn saw a hint of concern in his eyes that suggested he had more than one reason for asking.

     Evelyn hesitated a moment, and just when she had opened her mouth to reply, one of the baristas, a pretty dark skinned girl named Michelle, walked to their table to take their order. Sighing with relief, she silently thanked no one in particular for her timely interruption, as it gave her a moment to decide what book to tell him she was reading.

     “Hello! What can I get you?” She asked, smiling sweetly at them.

     “My usual would be wonderful.” Evelyn said, smiling a bit back at her politely. Michelle, having known her from her frequent visits in the past, knew that her usual was Earl Grey tea. Nodding, she turned to Adrien.

     “And you, sir?”

     Adrien grinned at her and rattled off some fancy sounding order of which Evelyn hardly understood a word. Michelle, however, knew exactly what he was talking about and after saying she’d return in a bit with their drinks, left.

     “Where were we?” Adrien asked, facing her again, smiling. “Oh! Yes, you were going to tell me about the wonderful book you lost sleep over.”

     “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.” Evelyn replied. She had actually finished it less than twenty four hours after she bought it on the day it came out, but Adrien didn’t need to know that.

     “Ah, Harry Potter, that’s the wizard with the glasses and scar on his head, no?”

     Evelyn stared at him unblinkingly, rather shocked. “You mean to tell me you’ve not read Harry Potter?”

     Adrien shook his head, looking amused at her surprise. “I’ve always preferred older books over newer ones, but I will most definitely add the series to my list! You seem to be quite enthusiastic about them.”

     “‘Enthusiastic about them’,” Evelyn shook her head in disbelief. “How can one not be? J.K. Rowling has likely written one of the best series in the history of literature! Anyone who isn’t enthusiastic about Harry Potter either hasn’t been introduced to it yet, or has a severe lack of taste.”

     Adrien laughed. “I suppose I had better like it, then, lest you think of me as severely lacking in taste.”

     “Oh, it’s already too late for that. You’re French. ‘French’ is a synonym for severely lacking in taste.” She replied, suppressing a smile.

     “You’re English. You’d know all about lack of taste, now wouldn’t you?”

     Evelyn gasped in slight offense. “Excuse me! I’ll have you know that I do!”

     “You do?” Adrien raised an eyebrow and laughed. “I never thought you’d admit it so soon.”

     “Damn it,” she cursed under her breath. “I meant that I don’t. I’m not Gordon Ramsay, but I can cook!”

     “Then you are more than welcome to prepare an appetizer for dinner tomorrow night” Adrien grinned.

     “Wait- what?”

     Just then, Michelle returned with their beverages. Evelyn, still a bit shocked that Adrien wanted to meet with her again so soon, thanked her absentmindedly as she placed her tea in front of her. Adrien thanked her in French and winked at her, and she blushed and returned to work.

     “What do you say, mon amie?” Adrien asked, looking at Evelyn as he blew on his coffee. “My two roommates are having their girlfriends over for dinner with us tomorrow, and I’d prefer not to be the fifth wheel. Care to join us? I’ll be making dessert.”

     She took a long sip of tea before replying, both to savor the taste and feeling alleviate her nerves. Evelyn set her cup down and met Adrien’s gaze, feigning nonchalance even though she was elated to be invited to something, especially when Adrien was the one to invite her. “I’ve nothing better to do, why not?”

     Adrien’s eyes lit up and he beamed. “I’ll pick you up at five, if that’s all right?”

     “Yes, that works.” Evelyn shrugged, not wanting the Frenchman to know how excited the idea of eating his food again made her.

     “Then it’s a date!” He grinned and lifted his coffee cup into the air, as if making a toast, before taking a small drink of it.

     Evelyn flushed a bit and looked away, a little embarrassed for being flustered by his comment. She sipped her tea again, her brow furrowed a little. 

     Adrien spoke again and Evelyn met his gaze again, her ever-present internal frown shifting to a smile when she saw the mirthful glint in his sapphire eyes. Why what the man said a moment ago made her heart flutter, Evelyn didn’t know, and right now, she was enjoying his company too much to care. Having someone to talk to was quite pleasant, especially when that someone was as delightful as Adrien Meyer.


	7. Chapter Seven

Evelyn had sifted through her recipe box for almost twenty minutes before finding an adequate one, potted cromer crab. She hadn’t ever actually made any of them personally, including this one, but she vowed that someday, each one of those little cards would be stained during the preparing of the food as all recipes are over time. After purchasing the ingredients and setting them all out neatly on the counter, she took a deep breath and began to cook.

      It seemed to be going rather well for a little while, that little while consisting only of opening the things she had bought, until the time came to measure the ingredients. The problem was that the recipe was in European measurements...and all she had were American measurements.

      “Bollocks.” She muttered under her breath. She had never quite grasped the difference, and didn’t cook or bake enough with European measurements, so she hadn’t bothered to buy a scale. It couldn’t be that hard, right…?

      “Two-hundred and twenty-five grams….” Evelyn said, thinking aloud. “That should be the equivalent of...two and a quarter cups? Sounds right….” She shrugged and started measuring the ingredients using that logic, blissfully unaware of the disaster she was creating.

      Due to this being the first time she made it and that she had only had eaten it once before as a child, she didn’t think anything amiss about the texture or unpleasantly bitter smell to it. She set aside the small casserole dish she had baked the...whatever was in it, unknowingly at too high of a temperature, and took up a serrated knife and the long, thin baguette she had gotten to go along with it. She sliced it into half an inch thick pieces, so they could spread the topping over it to eat.

      She put that into a bowl and covered it before cleaning up her mess, which was quite extensive. How she had gotten bits of crab stuck to the wall, she wasn’t sure she wanted to know. Though it took a while for her to get the stove and oven back to the way it was supposed to look and she was a bit tired from the effort from it all, Evelyn didn’t regret any of it. She had a rather nice looking appetizer ready to take to Adrien’s when he picked her up, and even indulged in a bit of hope that he and the others would like it.

      She glanced at the clock and saw she had an hour left to get ready. With a slightly nervous sigh, she went upstairs and began sifting through her closet. She hadn’t been out in...God, she didn’t know how long it had been anymore. Years, without a doubt. She had never really been good at interacting socially with ease, but just how out of practice was she? Would she end up completely embarrassing herself, in front of Adrien, no less?

      Evelyn bit her lip and chose a random, casual dress, not really caring which outfit she ended up wearing. As she changed, her mind churned with anxiety. There were going to be four people there she had never met, all of them of which Adrien was close to, certainly closer to than he was with her. Would- She huffed and cut her thoughts off before they could plant any more seeds of doubt. Usually, she would simply let her mind wander and create as many improbable situations she would likely never encounter, but right now, she wanted to be clear headed rather than clouded by worry. Nervousness would only aid her in making a fool of herself.

      With a deep breath and then a sigh, she went to the bathroom and put on her wig and artificial eyebrows. After she styled her hair up into an updo, she decided to do a bit of makeup. She dug her makeup bag out from under the sink and laid its contents out over the counter. She started with foundation, which was the palest she could find in stores, and then reached for her mascara. She paused and frowned, remembering that she had no eyelashes to put it on; chemo had taken them away. She put the tube back in her bag, not wanting to be reminded of it again, and continued. She chose a light brown for her eyeshadow, as it contrasted nicely with her coral dress, and picked a shimmery, red tinted lip gloss for her lips.

      She looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. The dress didn’t cover her body as much as she liked. It wasn’t immodest, but it seemed to accentuate how unhealthily skinny she was. Her collar bones jutted out quite prominently, and her arms were so thin, even she was alarmed at how they looked. It wasn’t as if she didn’t know how unhealthy she had become, but it shocked her as if she was just now fully realizing the extent. There was no way she was going to wear this dress tonight. It wouldn’t be so bad with a coat on, but she wouldn’t have to wear one inside.

      Evelyn was just about to return to her closet and change when her doorbell rang. She cursed under her breath and hurried downstairs to answer the door, knowing she wouldn’t have time to change now. She stopped and caught her breath a bit, hesitating a long moment before opening the door.

      Sure enough, it was Adrien. His eyes lit up the second they met hers, and his lips lifted into a wide smile.

      “Bonsoir, cherie.” He said happily.

      “Hello.” Evelyn answered a bit uncomfortably, as she saw that Adrien was noticing what she hoped he wouldn’t. His eyes had moved from her face to her body, and his smile had faded. His gaze wasn’t lecherous in the slightest, but rather concerned and sad. So much for him not noticing.

      “Just let me get my shoes on and the appetizer, then I’ll be ready to go.” She said, speaking before he could bring up what he was obviously thinking about. She turned away and slipped on her shoes before going to the kitchen and taking up the bowl and small casserole dish. She took a deep breath, wondering if going was even a good idea anymore, and walked back to the foyer, where Adrien waited patiently for her.

      “Ready?” He asked with a weak smile.

      She nodded and avoided his gaze, handing him the food as he held his arms out for it and donning her coat, making sure to button it up. She followed Adrien as he went back to his car and got in the passenger seat as he held the door open for her.

      “Thank you.” Evelyn said quietly, buckling her seatbelt.

      “It is my pleasure.” He smiled a bit more genuinely and closed the door. He walked around and got into the driver’s seat before buckling, starting the car, and pulling out of the driveway. “So, what did you make for the appetizer? I didn’t get a good look at it, but it certainly seemed...interesting! Did it have spinach in it?”

      She blinked. She knew she had overcooked it a bit, but to the point where it looked like it had something in it that wasn’t...? God, she hoped she didn’t screw it up too badly.

      “Ah...no. It was crab.”

      “Hm.” Adrien replied, an ever so slight look of suppressed concern on his face at what made the crab look that way. “I’m sure it will be good.” He added uncertainly.

      Evelyn didn’t notice his apprehension and felt her spirits lift a bit. He thought it was going to be good? No one had ever had that hope in her before. Culinarily, anyways.

      “Does everyone know I’m coming…?” She asked slightly apprehensively.

      “You mean Gilbert, Antonio, and their girlfriends? But of course! They all look forward to meeting you, cheri.”

      She glanced at him. “They know who I am?”

      Adrien blinked and smiled a bit sheepishly. “Ah, yes. I’ve mentioned you once or twice and they like meeting new people. Well, except for Lovina, she’s a bit unfriendly...but a wonderful cook! She’ll be making dinner tonight.”

      Evelyn nodded and stared out the window, a bit flattered that he had mentioned her to other people in his life before. That meant he thought of her outside of when they spent time together, which made her feel rather happy.

      They soon arrived at the house, and Adrien quickly jumped out of the car and opened Evelyn’s door for her before she could do so herself, grinning at her.

      “Mademoiselle,” he said, bowing and extending a hand to help her out of the car.

      She rolled her eyes, despite taking his hand briefly, and got out. “Showing off your manners, eh?”

      “I can’t have you thinking too ill of the French, now can I?” He replied with a cheeky wink. “I must prove that we can be gentlemen, too, lest you think me a barbarian.”

      “Ah, but it’s too late for that.” Evelyn suppressed a chuckle and got the appetizer she made from the car before following Adrien to the door, trying not to show her amusement at what he said as they walked.

      “You wound me so!” He cried dramatically, as if he were reenacting a scene from a passionate play. “I have done my best, yet been rejected!” He pretended to stumble against the front door and leaned heavily against it as if he had hardly any energy left. “Here I s-stand...at the doorstep of death...waiting for my soul to be claimed and taken from this life of misery. Woe is I, for I have been turned aside by the fairest maiden in all the lands!”

      It was all Evelyn could do not to laugh at his downright ridiculousness, and just when she was about to crack, the door opened, causing Adrien to fall in a heap on the ground with a yelp of shock. The red eyed, pale haired man who had opened the door took a step back and looked slightly alarmed before snorting.

      “Are you drunk again, Ad? Antonio, Adrien is drunk again!” He called out in amusement.

      "I am not drunk.” Adrien said indignantly, standing with a small huff as he straightened out his clothes and dusted off imaginary dirt. “I was simply trying to make Evelyn laugh.”

      “Never mind, Tonio! He was just being an idiot!” He guffawed.

      Adrien rolled his eyes, but was smiling. “You’re one to talk, Gilbert. Wasn’t it just yesterday that you used liquid dish soap in the dishwa-”

      “Hallo!” Gilbert interrupted, extending a hand toward Evelyn. “I am Gilbert Kaiser, the one and only! If you’re unsure whether you should bow, kiss my feet, or beg for me to have sex with you, know that all are welcome!”

      Evelyn blinked and shook his hand briefly. “I’ll...uh, pass.”

      He laughed and gestured for her to come inside. “Welcome to the coolest place you’ll ever be!”

      She walked inside, a bit overwhelmed and slightly disturbed by Gilbert. As Adrien closed the door, she noticed a blonde woman a few feet away from them who was frowning slightly at the German man, looking a bit hurt. Gilbert didn’t notice, but Adrien did and tapped his roommate’s shoulder before nodding to the woman. He looked at her and then grinned.

      “Hey, Schatz! Why the long face? You’re too pretty to frown!”

      This didn’t seem to affect her at all.

      “What did you mean by ‘beg for me to have sex with you’ being ‘welcome’?” She asked, her tone laced with slight anger and hurt.

      Gilbert blinked and the realization dawned. “Uh...I meant that she is welcome to do that! But I would not do her. The only Frau I do is you.”

      The woman’s cheeks turned pink and she looked away, though she didn’t seem as offended as before. She cleared her throat and looked up at Evelyn, smiling shyly.

      “Hello. I’m Sadie. Can I take those to the kitchen for you?” She asked, gesturing to the bowl and dish she was holding.

      “It’s lovely to meet you.” Evelyn replied with a small smile. “Ah, no, no, don’t trouble yourself. Perhaps simply show me where it is?”

      “Of course.” Sadie said softly, turning and starting toward the kitchen. Evelyn followed, and Adrien and Gilbert did as well, speaking in hushed voices. The second they were in sight of the kitchen, a green eyed brunet man bounded over to them, grinning.

      “You must be Evelyn!” The Spaniard exclaimed, going straight for a brief hug rather than a handshake. “Adrien has talked about you so much!”

      Evelyn blinked in slight surprise, both at the unexpected hug and what he had said. She confirmed that she was who he thought she was and inferred that he was Antonio, then glanced at Adrien.

      “You’ve talked about me a lot?”

      Adrien chuckled a bit, looking slightly apprehensive, as if unsure if she would be upset about that. “Ah, what can I say? You’ve been occupying my thoughts quite a bit lately, so I’ve spoken of you to those around me when the subject allowed….”

      Evelyn simply nodded a little, not knowing what to say to that. She had been occupying his thoughts lately…? God, that made the butterflies in her stomach flutter madly. Why had he been thinking of her?  _ No, it doesn’t matter. _ She thought, taking a quiet, deep breath.  _ But bloody hell, do I want to know! _

      With a small smile, Sadie politely took the appetizer from Evelyn and set it on the counter, and a brunette woman who was standing at the stove turned and glared at all of them as Gilbert cackled at something Antonio said.

      “Get the hell out of my kitchen!” She frowned, her words spoken with a thick Italian accent. She proceeded to ask, her question adorned with an unnecessary amount of unique vulgarities, why they thought she could make a proper marinara sauce with so many people in her kitchen being loud and disrupting her focus, then ordered them all out until she was finished.

      “But, cariño, wasn’t I helping you?” Antonio asked with a charming smile, seemingly unaffected by her cursing.

      “Not anymore.” Lovina huffed, turning back to her sauce and muttering, “Sadie is going to help me now. She’s the only tolerable one here.”

      “You haven’t even properly met Evelyn yet….” Adrien said under his breath.

      Antonio chuckled and ushered everyone but Sadie away from the kitchen. “I guess we will have to find something to do until dinner’s done!”

      Gilbert gasped and something sparked in his crimson eyes that roused an uneasy feeling in Evelyn. Whatever idea had just come to him, there was no doubting that it was one that was sure to cause trouble.

      “Tonio...the potato cannon. Get a potato and a tomato and get that ass of yours outside.” He stated with a maniacal giggle. Antonio’s smile widened and the two of them dashed off, Gilbert shouting something about meeting them in the backyard.

      “...did I just hear him properly?” Evelyn asked, both slightly concerned and disturbed by the idea. “Gilbert has a...potato cannon?”

      “Don't ever underestimate an overconfident, unemployed man with too much time on his hands.” Adrien replied with a small chuckle. “Come on, we’d best go outside before he drags us us out there.”

      Though uncertain, she followed him as he went outside. The other two men joined them a few moments later, Gilbert holding a contraption and Antonio holding a tomato and potato in either of his hands.

      “Watch and learn what it means to be awesome!” Gilbert exclaimed, taking the potato from Antonio and moving to stand a few yards away.

      “Wait a moment, are they going to….” Evelyn trailed off as she watched Antonio put the red fruit atop his head.

      “Oh, they are.” Adrien said, sounding amused. “Gil must either really like you or be in a careless mood, because he normally would avoid getting the cannon out while Lovina is here. Antonio got a black eye from it once from trying this stunt, and she gets quite angry whenever Gilbert brings it out.”

      “Keep still or you might get a concussion!” Gilbert cackled as he aimed his potato cannon at the tomato on Antonio’s head.

      “I can’t possibly imagine why.” Evelyn said sarcastically, though was genuinely a bit concerned.

      “Will do!” Antonio grinned, far less alarmed by the situation than a person at the mercy of a questionably sane German with a cannon set to fire in their direction should be.

      Gilbert charged the canon and after it was ready, smiled widely and aimed it at the tomato. “Drei, zwei, eins...Feuer!”

      He fired it the second he shouted the last word, and the potato shot out at a surprisingly high speed. Evelyn jumped at the boom that sounded through the air and quickly looked at Antonio, relieved to find that it hadn’t killed him, but instead hit the tomato on his head as it was supposed to.

      “Ha! See? Freaking awesome!” Gilbert said victoriously. “Evelyn, come on, you’re next!”  
Evelyn’s eyes widened and she was about to firmly protest when the back door slammed open. A furious looking Lovina stomped toward Gilbert, who quickly attempted to hide the cannon behind himself.

      “You kraut eating bastard! What the hell have I told you about firing that goddamn thing at Antonio?!” She shouted.

      “Hey, he wanted to! Yell at him, he can decide things for himself; he’s an adult!” Gilbert defended, hoping to save himself from any possible injury from the disgruntled Italian.

      “He may be twenty-five, but we all know he’s no smarter than a goddamn six year old!”

      “That’s a bit harsh….” Adrien stepped in, frowning a little. “He isn’t an idiot.”

      Evelyn had never seen him act protective before and if she were to be honest, there was something quite endearing about it. The butterflies in her stomach yet again began to flutter.

      “Shut up!” Lovina snapped, causing Adrien to roll his eyes with a huff.

      “Please don’t fight, you guys.” Antonio said with a patient sigh.

      “I’ll fight with whoever I damn well please!”

      “Ah...let’s get inside, eh?” Sadie said softly to Evelyn, her small smile bearing a hint of uneasiness.

      “Do they argue like this a lot?” She asked, following her as the two of them slipped away and went inside.

      “Unfortunately, they do. Lovina tends to argue with everyone, and Gilbert likes to push people’s buttons, so...I’m sure you can imagine how that often plays out.” Sadie chuckled nervously.

      “And let me guess, Adrien always backs Gilbert up and Antonio either tries to stop the fighting or wasn’t paying attention in the first place?” Evelyn said.

      She blinked and looked a little surprised. “That’s spot on….”

      “I’m a good judge of character.” She shrugged.

      “That’s an understatement; you should be a criminal profiler.”

      “Oh, now you’re exaggerating.” Evelyn chuckled softly.

      “I’m not!” Sadie said genuinely. “I wish so badly that I had an ability like that...Oh, your coat! May I take it? Sorry, I should’ve offered sooner...are you thirsty? There’s water, juice, soda, tea, and even beer or wine if you want.”

      She chuckled again and took off her coat before draping it over the back of a chair at the dining room table to answer her first question. “Tea sounds lovely.”

      Sadie smiled and immediately got to putting a kettle on the stove. “What kind would you like? I don’t know what sorts the guys have, but Gilbert has told me that Adrien has taken a liking to tea as of late, so there should be something decent.”

      Evelyn nodded and sat at the table as Sadie motioned for her to do so. “Ah, Earl Grey, perhaps? But anything will do, really.”

      She smiled and nodded before looking through a small box full of tea bags. She smiled and pulled out one of the small packages. “Perfect, he has Earl Grey.”

      The two women conversed at the table until the others returned from outside, Lovina still looking angry as she stomped over to check on the food, which Sadie had been keeping an eye on and stirring.

      “Well!” Adrien said, clasping his hands together and smiling at Evelyn. “Shall we bring out the lovely appetizer you so kindly prepared? I do look forward to trying it.”

      Evelyn smiled a bit shyly and Sadie stood and hurried over to where she had put it before uncovering the casserole dish and the bread. She smelled it and blinked a few times.

      “Well, this smells...interesting!” She said in the most genuine a voice she could.

      “Thank you.” Evelyn said with a modest smile, not realizing that her words weren't quite as genuine as they may have seemed.

      Adrien walked over to the counter and with a smile, took up a piece of the bread. He used a small butter knife to top it with the spread before taking a bite. Instantly, the light in his eyes died. Horror replaced the slight excitement that resided there previously and he quickly spat it into the trash.

      Evelyn blinked in shock. “What’s wrong…?”

      “You made that?” He asked, suppressing a shudder.

      “Yes....why?” She replied, frowning a little.

      Sadie spoke before Adrien had a chance to answer. “I'm sure it's wonderful.” She said, walking over to try it herself.

      “Ady here is a picky little bitch anyways!” Gilbert said, more to pick on Adrien than make Evelyn feel better.

      Sadie took a bite and her face paled a bit. Evelyn looked hopeful, but the rest of them knew better. “It’s...good.” She forced herself to say, managing a weak smile.

      Hope sparked in Evelyn’s eyes. “Really…?”

      Sadie merely nodded and mustered every inch of bravery she had to force herself to take another bite.

      She looked at Adrien, huffing slightly. “See? It obviously isn’t as good as the food you make...but it’s good.” She said before looking away, cursing internally at how pathetic she sounded.

      Adrien sighed lightly and felt a bit guilty, but didn’t feel nearly remorseful enough to subject himself to eating more of it to ease her unrest, so he merely moved to stand next to her and kissed her cheek. “Désolé, chérie.”

      Evelyn’s eyes widened at the kiss and her face immediately turned red in embarrassment. She looked at Adrien in shock, and he merely winked at her with a charming smile. She averted her eyes, feeling her face only grow hotter.

* * *

As the night went on, Evelyn’s thoughts of the kiss faded a little, but never fully left her mind. Could he have meant more than mere friendliness by it…? She hadn’t seen him kiss anyone since she met him, even though he was an affectionate person...but then again, that didn’t mean much. She wasn’t with him every moment of the day. Perhaps he did casually kiss cheeks like this. Evelyn’s uncertainty led to a slightly uneasy feeling of flusterment throughout the night, thankfully one that was easy to ignore, so she could actually enjoy herself.

      After Adrien had taken her home, she had gotten ready for bed in quite a better mood than usual, having quite enjoyed spending the evening with Adrien and his friends. They were more than welcoming, and for the first time in ages, she’d actually enjoyed herself. They seemed to enjoy having her there as well, which was a huge relief.

      As she curled up in bed and hugged a pillow to her chest, thoughts of Adrien’s kiss to her cheek returned, bringing along a cluster of butterflies that fluttered madly in her stomach. God, she hoped so badly it had meant something. Evelyn buried her face into the pillow, squirming in her bed as her heart pounded in her chest. She had done her best to deny it, but she could no longer do so. There was no doubt about it; she was falling in love.


	8. Chapter Eight

When Evelyn woke the next morning, she found that the all too familiar heaviness in her chest was still there. Not that she had expected otherwise; it was never fully gone, it was merely easier to ignore at times. Adrien. Adrien was what made it easiest to ignore. The thought of him caused the butterflies from the previous night to stir to life again, chasing away the lurking thoughts of darkness for the time being.

She got out of her bed and yawned, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes before stretching and sighing. She headed downstairs and started her morning routine, which involved making tea and toast. As she waited for the tea to boil and let the butter sink into her rather charred toast to help it be less rock-like, she glanced around. Her gaze landed on her computer, which she had not used in quite a long time. She was never on it much in the first place, only to check her business e-mail and contact clients, but after she was diagnosed, her depression had taken a turn for the worst and she’d lost her will to work along with her one to live. But now, perhaps it was time to get back to working. Her savings weren’t exactly looking good nowadays, and she didn’t want to be homeless on top of everything.

She turned the computer on, and fetched her tea while it booted up. She brought her breakfast to her desk and sat down, taking a bite of toast before opening up her e-mail. As expected, there were quite a few. Nearly half of it was spam, but the other half were inquiries from people seeking to have her photograph their weddings. Though there were plenty of them, the vast majority were ones that were too late to reply to, as the wedding dates for them had already passed. She scrolled through them, finding one that was sent two days ago. She blew on her tea to cool it a little and took a sip as she read it over.

 

To: _Evelyn Clark_ <evelynclarkphotography@aph.com>

From: _Ilaria Rossi_ <pasta4ever@aph.com>

Subject: Hi!

 

Hello Evelyn! My name is Ilaria Rossi (Soon to be Ilaria Kaiser :D ) and I’m looking for a photographer for my wedding! (: Its in three weeks but we are willing to pay you extra for the short notice! The wedding will be in town, at the church across from the park

Let me know if you can! I really like your work and my fiance Ludwig and I would love to have you photograph our wedding <3

 

Below was Ilaria’s contact information and no less than seven consecutive emojis, which was slightly puzzling to Evelyn, as the e-mails she received were usually quite professional, but somehow endearing in its own way. She typed a reply to her, telling her that she was interested and to tell her a time and place that worked to meet her and her fiancé and discuss the details.

She had just sent the e-mail when her phone rang. Her heart jumped in her chest, her thoughts immediately turning to Adrien, who was the only person who called her as of late. She stood and hurried over, snatching up her phone and feeling disappointed when she didn’t see his name on her screen. She answered the call nonetheless.

“Hello?”

“May I speak with Evelyn Clark?”

“This is she.” She said, a bit puzzled.

“I’m calling from Doctor Seppä’s office to remind you of your appointment at two pm today.” The woman said.

Evelyn blinked, having totally forgotten about it; they had called to schedule an appointment a few days ago. Was it already time for another dose of chemotherapy? No, it couldn’t be that…. Dread and fear filled her mind. What was wrong…? As always, he had taken a blood and bone marrow sample before giving her the previous dosage...something must be wrong with it.

“I-I will be there.” She says, hoping her stutter went unnoticed.

“Thank you, I’ll let Doctor know. Have a good day, Miss Kirkland.” The woman said before hanging up.

Evelyn pulled her robe tighter around herself and tried to keep her breathing under control, lest she spiral into a panic attack. Had her cancer gotten worse? Was it not reacting to the chemo? Was she dying…? Her thoughts told her every day that she wanted to, but when faced with the idea of it happening on terms other than her own, it terrified her.

She didn’t bother finishing her breakfast and instead went to the living room, where she laid down and curled up in a ball. Her bottom lip quavered as tears threatened to fall down her cheeks, but she managed to keep them at bay. She forced herself to take deep, even breaths, and stayed there all morning, praying silently to no one in particular that things would be okay, because now, she had someone she wanted to stay alive for.

* * *

 

It seemed to take days for two o’clock to arrive, and when it finally did, Evelyn wished it hadn’t. She was sitting in the waiting room of the doctor’s office, bouncing her leg anxiously and chewing the inside of her cheek raw.  _ God, why does it always have to take so bloody long? _ She thought, glancing at the clock for what must’ve been the thousandth time since she arrived. Eleven minutes past two.

Just when she was about to stand and ask the receptionist when the doctor would see her, one of the nurses opened the door to the hall that lead to the examination rooms.

“Evelyn Clark.” She called out.

Evelyn jumped and looked up, ever so slightly relieved to see the familiar face of a nurse she had gotten along well with during her visits, Elizabeta Héderváry. She managed to force a weak smile as she stood and walked over. Elizabeta hugged her tightly and rubbed her back comfortingly.

“Hey, sweetie.” She said softly, pulling away and smiling at her. “You’re looking better. You’ve been eating well, haven’t you? You aren’t as bony as you were last I saw you.”

“I have, yes. Have you been well?” She asked in return, not just out of politeness; she truly did care.

Elizabeta lead her to the examination room and sighed. “Well, Roderich and I broke off our engagement.”

The news caused Evelyn to momentarily forget her worries.  “What?”

She opened the door to the exam room and followed her inside with a soft, shy laugh.

“Well...we had a huge fight, and long story short, I realized neither of us cared about the other as much as I thought we did.”

Evelyn looked sympathetic and didn’t inquire further, sensing that she was keeping it vague because she didn’t want to talk about it, not because she wanted her to ask.

“Are you doing all right?”

“Bless your heart.” Elizabeta smiled softly at her and nodded. “I am, hon. Enough of me! How are you? Have you been experiencing any nausea, irritable bowels, dizziness, fatigue…?”

Evelyn sighed quietly. “Fatigue; I’ve been sleeping a lot and feeling tired when I’ve had an more than an adequate amount of sleep.”

She nodded and took up a chart, writing a little on it. “And have you been sexually active?”

“No.” Evelyn answered curtly.

Elizabeta shook her head and sighed. “Girl, you need to get some. It’s no wonder you always seem so stressed!”

Her cheeks flushed slightly in embarrassment and she sat up a bit straighter. “So you say each time….”

“I mean it!” She says, sighing again before moving on to the other required questions.

When Elizabeta was done filling out the chart, the two of them chatted a bit more before Elizabeta, regretfully, had to leave and get back to work. Evelyn waited as patiently as she could for Doctor Sepp ä to get around to seeing her; or rather, as he insisted she call him, Elias.

She bounced her leg and stared down at her shaking, clasped hands. She chewed on the inside of her cheek and thankfully, before her thoughts had a chance to wander into dark places, Elias knocked on the door and opened it. The blond, blue eyed man smiled widely at her, and her worries eased a bit. He didn’t look this happy when he was about to deliver bad news...that meant something wasn’t horribly wrong with her.

“Moi, Evelyn!” He greeted cheerily, walking over to shake her hand.

Evelyn managed a weak smile and shook his hand back, returning his greeting in his mother language.

“Moi, Doctor Elias.”

“Have you been well? I do hope so!” Elias said, letting go of her hand and taking up her chart, looking happy to see there was nothing abnormal there.

Evelyn nodded and swallowed the nervousness building up in her throat. She was about to speak up and ask why she was there when Elias seemed to read her mind.

“Don’t be worried, you’re not here because anything is wrong. There was just something about the results of your last blood and marrow test that we want to double check.” He said reassuringly.

“What was off about it?” She asked uncertainly, dread filling her chest with a heavy feeling.

Elias hesitated. “I...I don’t know if telling you right now is the best idea. I don’t want to get your hopes up.”

She nodded, unable to speak.  _ Does that mean…am I cured? Is the cancer finally gone? _ She thought, her previously weighed down heart beating rapidly in hope.

“So...I’m sorry, but that does mean we will need to do a biopsy and a blood test.” He said with a sad smile.

“...lovely.” Evelyn muttered. God, did she hate having bone marrow biopsies. Blood tests? Easy. All she had to do was immerse her mind in another world and ignore the minimal pain until it was over. But the former...the former was not so easy to ignore.

“We’ll get it over with as soon as possible.” Elias assured her, resting a hand on her shoulder before handing her a hospital gown that was laid out on the bed for her. “I will have Elizabeta come prepare you for the procedure after you change.”

Evelyn nodded and after he left to give her privacy, took a deep breath and looked down at the gown in her hands.  _ This might be the last time I have to wear one of these for this procedure...I could be cured. _ She thought, the idea of such being possible not really registering in her mind. It was all she’d hoped for in the past three years...which is why it was so hard to accept that it might be true. She couldn’t let herself get her hopes up too much, lest she be shattered if it was all for naught.


	9. Chapter Nine

Four days after Evelyn’s doctor’s appointment, she had no results to show, just a very sore upper hip bone. She would be lying if she said the lack of a phone call hadn’t made her anxious, even though she knew not getting results so soon was perfectly normal; it took a little while. All she could do was try to distract herself and make the days pass as quickly as possible, which is why she was looking forward to that day so much. She had a meeting with the first potential client she’d had in almost a year, and had a picnic planned with Adrien, so it wouldn’t be as bad as sitting alone at home.

As a way to help occupy herself and hopefully feel a little less abnormal than she normally did, she paired her jeans with a cute burnt orange top and did her makeup a little. She decided to wear a thicker pair of fake eyelashes than she usually did and even a bit of light brown eyeshadow. She looked at herself in the mirror after putting on a reddish chapstick and managed a weak smile. It felt a bit odd being slightly dressed up, but in a nice way.

_ I wonder if Adrien will notice…. _ She thought, her cheeks pinkening slightly.  _ He usually notices little things like this. I wonder if that means anything...probably not. _ She frowned and ran a hand over her face, gasping when she remembered she was wearing makeup. She jerked her hand away and immediately assessed the damage. Thankfully, it was nothing a drop of water on a piece of toilet paper couldn’t fix. God, she was not cut out for this girly stuff as much as she wished she was. Perhaps it would come with time.

Evelyn took a deep breath and headed downstairs after slipping on her favorite pair of boots. She fixed her wig in the mirror in the foyer, pulled on her coat, and slung her purse over her shoulder before heading out the door, locking it behind her. She took a deep breath of the crisp autumn air, savoring how refreshed it made her feel, and started walking. At times, especially during the frigid months, she wished she had a car, but not the rest of the year. She got exercise, didn’t have to pay for insurance or gas, and if she needed to go somewhere too far, she could easily get a cab or an Uber, so being without a vehicle didn’t bother her too much.

Thankfully, she lived closed to town as well, so it didn’t take her long to reach the coffee shop she and the future Mr. and Mrs. Kaiser were going to meet at. She walked inside and looks around, having no idea what they look like. A little brunette with light brown eyes, an odd, wayward curl, and a huge grin jumped up from her table and hurried over.

“Are you Evelyn?” She asked excitedly in a charming Italian accent. “I recognize your picture from your website; you’re prettier in person. I love your eyes!”

Evelyn blinked in surprise, not having expected the bombardment of words. “I am, yes. And thank you. I assume that you’re Ilaria?”

“Sì!” She exclaimed and hugged Evelyn before taking her hand and leading her over to a blond, stoic looking man who bore a slight frown.

“This is Ludwig, my fiancé!” She said happily, letting go of her hand to stand at Ludwig’s side.

“How many times have I told you not to be so friendly toward strangers?” Ludwig quietly reprimanded.

“But she’s not a stranger!” Ilaria protested with a smile. “She’s our photographer!”

“Wait, you’ve decided to hire me?” Evelyn asks, a bit surprised at the hopefulness she heard in her own tone.

Ilaria looks at Ludwig, her eyes pleading as she smiled pleadingly. Evelyn suppressed a chuckle, able to tell that it was not the first time Ilaria had used that look on him, and most certainly not the first time Ludwig had given into it.

“Very well.” He says with a light sigh. He looked at Evelyn, who was ever so slightly intimidated by his piercing blue eyes, and extended his hand. “It is nice to meet you.”  
Evelyn chuckled softly and shook his hand. “Even though I am a stranger?”

Ludwig’s brow creased, though the corner of his lip quirked upward into a very slight, amused smile. “Even though you’re a stranger.” He said, letting go of her hand.

Ilaria grinned and pulled Ludwig down a little so she could kiss him before hugging Evelyn again. “I’m so happy to have you as our photographer!” She chirped.

Evelyn smiled a little and patted her back. “Thank you. We still have a lot to figure out, so we had best get to work.”

“We got you a coffee!” Ilaria said as she sat down, gesturing for her to join her at the table, which had three cups of coffee on it.

Not daring to say that she actually quite disliked coffee, Evelyn sat and thanked them for the kind gesture. She took a sip as Ludwig, too, sat, ignoring how unpleasant the taste was, and began the discussion of things they had to figure out.

Before she knew it, the three of them had finished for the day, and she had bade farewell to the happy couple. Evelyn just about to take up her phone and call Adrien when the sound of her ringer made her jump. With a slight smile at how amusing it would be if it was Adrien, she quickly picked it up, ready to greet him in French to make him chuckle, only to have her smile be stolen from her lips. It was Elias’s office. A shiver shot down her spine and she held her breath as she, with a shaking hand, took up her phone and answered the call.

“H-hello?”

“Hello, Evelyn.” Elias’s voice said on the other line, which surprised her. Doctors themselves never called. She stayed silent, terrified of what he would say next.

“Could you come into the office now?” He asked calmly. “I have the results of your test.”

Evelyn almost forgot to speak. “Y-yes.” She forced herself to say.

“See you in a bit.” Elias said, his tone indecipherable to her.

With that, she hung up and just stared ahead blankly, trying to pull herself together. But as much as she wanted to take her time doing so, she needed to get to the office as soon as she could. She gathered her things and stood, hurrying out of the coffee shop after pulling her coat and scarf back on.

Thoughts darted through her mind as she walked at a fast pace to the office, hardly able to stand that in a very short amount of time, she will know whether or not she’s still dying.  _ Whatever the results are...is it time to tell Adrien?  _ She thinks, biting her lip.  _ We only met a little while ago, but it feels like it’s been ages…how would he even react? I’m falling in love with him, but does he care about me at all…? He acts like he does, but perhaps I’m just seeing what I want to see…. _

She pushed the thoughts away, not wanting to make herself feel even worse. He had to care. If he didn’t, she would be devastated, thanks to her tendency to care so deeply so quickly. He had changed her life so much in such a short amount of time, and she was so thankful to him for it. He made the pain easier to bear and smiling came so easily around him; she didn’t know what she would do without him. The way his laugh rang through the air, the way his eyes looked when he spoke of something he was passionate about, the way his touch was always so warm and gentle...she was so entranced by it all. She had forgotten what life was like without him, and she never wanted to remember.

All too soon, and yet after far too long, Evelyn arrived at Elias’s office. She had been waiting for this day for so very long, but it felt as if it was here too soon. She didn’t know if she was ready for whatever the result was, which made her more uneasy. Was that a sign that it really wasn’t the day she found out she was cured…? She set her jaw and walked inside before she allowed her mind to make herself any more anxious.

Elizabeta was at the front desk, and when she glanced up, Evelyn saw that she was eager to know the result as well. She stood and met her halfway, hugging her tightly. She said nothing, knowing from working this job for several years that no amount of times she could assured her it would be okay could ease her heart. Elizabeta pulled away after a few moments and rested a hand on her shoulder, smiling weakly.

“Go get ‘em.” She murmured, letting go and briefly hugging her once more.

Evelyn nodded and silently followed Elizabeta as she led her to Elias’s personal office. She opened the door for her, and Evelyn held her breath as she walked inside. 

Elias was pacing back and forth, stopping immediately when he saw her walk in. He seemed to be holding something back as he smiled a little and walked over, extending his hand. “Hello, Evelyn.” He greeted softly.

She shook his hand, hers shaking quite a bit. “H-hello.” She replied, her voice hardly above a whisper.

He let go of her hand and gestured to a little sitting area, likely there for moments like this, when he had something important to tell a patient. She felt a bit lightheaded as she walked to one of the two small couches and slowly sat. Elias sat a little ways away from her and took a deep breath, looking at her.

“Would you like some water? You look a bit faint.” He said.

“I’m fine….” She said, tempted to demand he just spit it out already. Thankfully, her manners kept her lips sealed.

Elias nodded and looked at her. “I apologize to have perhaps made you nervous with how I’ve approached this...I’ve just never been good with breaking news like this, especially with patients like you. I never know how they will react...some don’t know what to do, since they were so used to life while sick.”

Evelyn’s eyes widened and she held her breath. “Wh-what?” She stammered, wondering if she had heard him right. Time seemed to slow, and she was overly aware of everything that was happening; the soft rush of her breath in her throat as she inhaled, the low hum of a nearby fish tank.

Elias smiled a little at her. “You didn’t mishear me. You’re not sick anymore, Evelyn. The cancer is gone.”

Evelyn’s heart nearly stopped and she just sat there, in shock. Her mouth was agape and a shiver ran through her in her complete disbelief.  _ I’m cancer free…?  _ She thought, hardly able to comprehend it.  _ It’s gone? I’m healthy again? _ Tears welled up in her eyes and then slid down her cheeks, and she made no move to stop them or wipe them away. She usually did all she could never to cry in front of anyone, but these were tears she had been hoping to shed for a very long time, and she was going to let them fall without shame.


	10. Chapter Ten

The next few hours after Evelyn received the news went by in a blur. She had tried to get a hold of her brothers, but none of them answered, which for the first time, didn’t bother her much. This time, she knew for sure she would be there to try them again in a day or two. She ended up just texting Allistor, who she knew was the eldest and least immature out of them all, telling him that she had some urgent news and to call her as soon as he got a chance to.

She was now in her bedroom, smiling widely and pacing back and forth, happier than she had been in a very long time. Her thoughts darted back and forth between all the possibilities she was blinded from before, and she couldn’t decide what to do first with her newfound life.  _ I can travel again.  _ She thought.  _ I can get married, I can have children. I can finally fall in love. _ Her eyes widened at the realization.  _ I can fall in love.... Adrien. _

Evelyn dashed toward her phone and eagerly unlocked it, failing the first time or two before finally getting her password right. She immediately went to her contacts and tapped Adrien’s name, chewing anxiously on the inside of her cheek as she heard the dial tone sound. She prayed he would pick up and that he hadn’t left it somewhere he couldn’t hear it, as he often did due to his slight dislike toward technology. Just when she feared it was going to go to the voicemail she had long since memorized, the melodic tone of his voice greeting her graced her ears.

“Bonjour, mon amour. How has your day been? I was just thinking about you. Tonight, do you perhaps want to-”

“Come over.” Evelyn interrupted. “Please. I need to talk to you about something important.”

Adrien was silent for a moment, likely surprised. “Now?”

“If you are able.” She said, biting her lip to keep the slight nervousness out of her tone, which quite a bit lighter than usual.

“I would drop anything for you.” He said sincerely. “I will be over the second I put my shoes on, all right?”

“See you soon.” She replied, then hung up and slipped her phone into her pocket. The realization that Adrien was going to be on his way to her house any moment and that she would confess her love to him when he arrived made her feel simultaneously relaxed and panicked. She exhaled a breath of relief and her heart pounded madly, as if the feelings trapped inside of it were trying to break free. She refused to allow herself to doubt whether or not he liked her back, for once, letting how much of a hopeless romantic she was decide her actions. Perhaps it was time she started to do that more; let her heart decide more often rather than relying solely on her mind.

She hurried over to her mirror and made sure she looked all right, really wanting to look good, or at least semi-decent, for him. She straightened her wig and let it down from the updo she had it in, remembering that Adrien preferred it when women had their hair loose rather than tied up. She ran her hands through it and ruffled it a little to give it more shape, grateful that it was thicker than her real hair was, back when she had real hair.

_Hair._ She thought. _I can grow my hair back._ She covered her mouth as a laugh broke free, followed instantly by another. She was so happy in that moment, she felt like she could burst into song, as cliché as that seemed. She was finally healthy again; cancer free and able to start living life the way it should be lived. She could do whatever she wanted, and found that thought a little overwhelming, as exhilarating as it was.

She considered putting on a little makeup, but quickly decided not to, not really wanting to go through the trouble and knowing Adrien wouldn’t think any differently of her with or without it. She didn’t exactly have the time anyways, as Adrien was likely mere minutes from her house. She wondered what she was going to say to him and if she would even be able to form coherent thoughts when they were face to face. She panicked a little and dashed to her bedside drawer, where she grabbed her spiral notebook. It was folded over to the last thing she had written in it, and she paid it no heed as she turned it to the other side. She stared at the blank page for a long moment before remembering that she would need a pen or pencil. She was just about to start looking for one when the chime of her doorbell rang through her house.

Evelyn gasped and forgot her task, dashing immediately downstairs, absentmindedly tossing the notebook onto her living room couch on her way to the door. She stopped when she arrived and bit her lip nervously, reaching out with a shaking hand and opening the door after a moment of hesitation.

Adrien stood before her, looking as immaculate as ever, but bearing a gleam of concern in his eyes instead of the one of carefree mirth he often carried with him. The instant the door was open enough for him to, he hugged Evelyn close.

“Mon amour…” he began softly, “you sounded so distressed. Please tell me you are all right.”

Evelyn felt her heart flutter warmly, which helped a little with her nervousness. “Adrien, it’s all right. I’m okay.” She said, internally delighted to actually be telling the truth in saying that.

Adrien’s body relaxed against her before he pulled away a moment later. “Thank God...what is it?”

She stepped aside and gestured for him to come inside. “I’m not going to tell you as you stand in the doorway, come in.”

He immediately complied, not so subtly desperate to know what she had to say to him. The reality of the situation began to set in, bringing along the rest of the nervousness that she had known would join her sooner or later. She took a deep, shaky breath and met Adrien’s anxious gaze, trying to find the words to say.

_ God, this is a lot more stressful than I imagined. _ She thought.

“Adrien, I-” Evelyn was interrupted by the ringing of her phone, which made Adrien look a little irritated as he muttered something about hating ‘those things’. She apologized and pulled it from her pocket to silence it when she saw that it was Allistor. She couldn’t leave him to go to voicemail, not when she had something so important to tell him.

“I am so terribly sorry, but I must take this.” She said apologetically. “It’s my brother.”

Adrien, despite sighing softly, nodded and made a gesture with his hand to signal she was okay to leave. She instantly dashed off to the bathroom and closed the door so she wouldn’t be overheard and answered the call.

“Allistor, you called back.” She said, a smile coming upon her face.

“What’s wrong?” Allistor’s worried voice answered. “What happened? Shit, Evie, don’t tell me it’s taken a turn for the worse….”

“Quite the contrary.” She said quickly, not wanting him to worry over her for a second longer. She grinned widely as she continued. “Allistor, it’s gone. It’s bloody gone.”

There was silence on the other end for a long moment. “If you’re joking, so help me, I’m going to kick your tiny ar-”

“I’m not joking! It really is gone. I found out this morning. I can hardly believe it myself, but I’m cancer free.”

There was silence and then a soft sniffle, which Evelyn pretended she didn’t hear, as she knew he would only firmly deny that he was crying.

“It...it’s gone for good?”

Evelyn didn’t want to think about or admit that there was always a chance it would return, so she let out a soft laugh of joy and nodded. “It is, yes. I’m going to be healthy again, finally.”

“Do Dylan and Seamus know?”

“No, just you. I tried calling them, but you know how they are.” She said, chuckling a little, finding their tendency to go to the pub almost every night endearing in her haze of elation.

“I’ll tell ‘em. Unless you want to, then I won’t.” Allistor said, clearing his throat and taking a deep breath.

“You can. Just tell them to call me, if you would. I haven’t spoken to either of the pricks in a while.”

Allistor laughed weakly. “Aye, I will. Ah, shit, I’m sorry, Evie, but I’ve got to go. I’ll call you as soon as I get a chance, okay?”

“Okay. I love you, Allistor.”

There was a long moment of silence, and just when she was about to hang up, she heard him mutter the same phrase back to her. Her grin widened and she bade him farewell before hanging up. She took a deep breath and slipped her phone back into her pocket, then left the bathroom and made her way back to the living room. She felt considerably less nervous than she did before, always having felt a sense of relief after speaking with Allistor.

Evelyn took another deep breath and looked up as she walked into the living room. Her eyes widened in worry and confusion when she saw Adrien sitting on the couch, her notebook in his hands, and tears streaming down his cheeks. He looked up at her when she walked in, a look of grief and pain upon his face.

“I-is this...is this true?” He murmured, holding up the notebook with a shaking hand.

Her mind swirled with confusion and she walked over, taking the notebook from him to see what he was so upset about. Her blood went cold and her eyes widened when she saw what it was. It was the suicide note she had written the day they met one another. Horror gnawed at her heart and she desperately tried to think of an excuse, but none came to mind.

Adrien stood and hugged her tightly, as if she would disappear at any moment. Her heart broke as she felt his body begin to convulse steadily with sobs.

“Adrien...I-I can explain.” She murmured, holding him.

“Ma chère, chère amoure pourquoi tu veuz quelque chose comme  ç a...? Dites-moi que c’est pas vrai….”

Evelyn couldn’t understand more than a word or two of what he said, but could guess well enough from his tone; he was utterly devastated. She didn’t try to explain herself now, giving him a moment to calm himself and process things. She couldn’t imagine how shocked he must have been to find that...god, why hadn’t she just ripped that page out? She hated that she hadn’t. This day had been going so blissfully well, and it was supposed to continue that way. Why did she have to screw everything up again?

Adrien continued to weep into her shoulder for some time, and Evelyn merely guided him to sit on the couch and comforted him the best she could. She stayed silent, lest she worsen his state with any ill placed words. She got the feeling that if she uttered the phrase, ‘it’s okay’, it would only send him into further hysterics. She tried her best to ignore the guilt, but having the man she loved in her arms, crying because of something she caused, made it difficult to forget.


	11. Chapter Eleven

It was a good while before Adrien had calmed down and stopped crying, though, he still held Evelyn closely, seeming almost fearful to let her go. They both had stayed silent through it all, Adrien out of devastation and Evelyn out of both fear of what he would think and self hatred at not having acted to prevent this from happening. She had been ready to tell him how she felt toward him...not about her depression or her struggle with cancer. She did love him, but she didn’t want him to think of her as weak or as someone he needed to be careful around. She already knew that both of those things were true, and she didn’t need any more reminders, especially not from the man who could change the course of her day with a mere word or expression. She was so incredibly vulnerable to him, and she wasn’t sure if she was willing to give him her all yet.

Evelyn stroked Adrien’s hair and chewed on the inside of her cheek anxiously, debating whether or not she should take action and speak first or wait until he initiated the inevitable discussion. She spent so long dancing between the two ideas, Adrien spoke before she had decided what to do.

“How...how long have you felt this way…?” He murmured, holding her almost painfully tight as he spoke.

She held her breath and swallowed a lump in her throat. “...Adrien, I don’t anymore. Not really.” She assured him. “I don’t feel as bad as I did when I wrote that. I wrote that ages ago...the day you made me soup when I was sick…?” She fought back tears of guilt and ones brought on by the painful memories. “That...that was the day that note was for...you saved my life.”

Adrien pulled away from the hug enough to look at her, his eyes bloodshot and puffy, but full of intense emotion. He looked devastated, sympathetic, and guilty, and it broke Evelyn’s heart.

“I did…?” he asked, his voice shaky and sadder than she’d ever heard him.

“You did.... And you’ve helped me get better. Not completely...it’s never completely gone.” She murmured. “But you help me see the light in this constant darkness.”

Adrien closed his eyes and took a deep, unsteady breath. “Mon dieu, Evelyn...if I had known….”  
“I do not want you to treat me any differently because of this.” She replied instantly, sounding almost pleading. “Please...I am just a regular person. Do not treat me specially just because I sometimes want to-...because I have dark thoughts on occasion.”

His expression softened and something akin to a smile settled upon his face. “What if I treat you specially for a different reason?”

Evelyn blinked incomprehensibly. “What reason…?”

“I do hope you will forgive me for my boldness, but it is always said that actions speak louder than words, and in moments like this, I prefer to rely on the former rather than the latter.” He said, moving a hand from the embrace up to her face to brush the pad of his thumb against her cheek.

Her confusion didn’t disperse at his words, only increased. She had parted her lips slightly and inhaled a small breath of air in preparation to ask again what he meant when all thoughts she had were wiped clear in one simple action. That action being Adrien capturing her lips in a passionate kiss. She became hyper-aware of everything the second it happened; the pounding of her heart, the rush of cool air in her throat as she inhaled sharply, and most of all, the wonderfully soft feeling of Adrien’s lips against hers. 

She managed to comprehend what was happening, and a moment later, her silenced thoughts returned full force. They darted madly around her mind as she tried to grasp the solid realization that they were kissing, and when she finally succeeded, it was over. Her eyes, which she hadn’t realized had even slid closed, fluttered open and bore into Adrien’s, which were full of what she desperately hoped was love. Neither of them spoke for nearly a full minute, and Evelyn wouldn’t have had it any other way; staring into his eyes with their hearts beating in unison, Adrien’s hand stroking her cheek ever so gently. It all felt so incredibly wonderful, and she never wanted it to end.

“Mon cherie...mon cherie Evelyn….” Adrien murmured, sounding completely awed by her. “I know I cannot love your illness away...I know I cannot take away the darkness that dwells within you, as much as I so dearly yearn to. I know I cannot heal all that makes you hurt.” The joy in his eyes turned slightly sad as he rested his forehead against hers and tangled his fingers in her hair. “But I will try. I will hold you as long as you need on days when you feel overwhelmed. I will kiss away your tears. I will love you. I will love you every single day until I die, Evelyn Clark. I have known that since the first time I saw you smile.”

Tears formed in her eyes as he spoke; she could hardly believe what was happening. Love and affection were laced so deeply in his tone, it took her breath away. His words were so beautiful and genuine, she almost couldn’t accept that they were uttered solely for her.

“Adrien...I-I….” She trailed off, unable to find a worthy reply. A soft sob caught in her throat and she closed her eyes, a tear sliding down her cheek.

“Do not feel obliged to reply, mon amour.” He murmured, pulling her into another secure hug and rubbing her back. “Silence is all right. I already know how you feel. Your eyes have long since told what your lips could not.”

Evelyn could feel the mirth of his smile as she held him back tightly, and she hoped he could feel her joy, too. She felt more loved in that moment than she ever had before in her life, and she absolutely adored it. The feeling of his arms around her, the sound of him breathing, the way his love radiated from his soul to hers, it all made her feel so incredibly comfortable and at home.

The two of them fell quiet and stayed like as they were, entwined into each other and silently enjoying the other’s company. Evelyn was the first of them to speak, after nearly an hour of the most relaxing silence she’d felt.

“I...Adrien, can we forget you ever found that bloody note?” She asked quietly, wishing yet again that she had just thrown it away.

“I will never mention it, if that is what you would prefer, but non, I will not forget.” He replied after a moment, moving his hand from the small of her back to fiddle with her hair instead. In the hour of silence, he had laid down and pulled her on top of him so they both were more comfortable, a position that Evelyn secretly adored.

She nodded and sighed. “Would you believe me if I said the note wasn’t real and that I’m not...you know.”

“Mon cherie, I think no differently of you because you have had a rough few years. Not even a little. It is nothing for you to be ashamed of, and I do hope it won’t prevent you from feeling anything but completely at ease with me now or in the future. Please, my dear, dear Evelyn, know that I love you, regardless, and I will keep loving you until I perish. Whether you are happy or sad, it will never change that I love you.”

Though he had certainly implied it, hearing him say the words aloud took Evelyn’s breath away and sped up the rhythm of her heart. Her cheeks flushed pleasantly and she held him a little closer.

“You make me feel warm all over.” She murmured, closing her eyes and listening to his heartbeat. She could think of no adequate reply to his eloquent words, so she had blurted the first thought that came to mind.

“I am glad to hear that.” He replied, his smile evident in his tone. “Say, amour, what did you call me over to tell me?”

Evelyn blinked and hesitated a moment.  _ Should I tell him about the cancer? _   She thought.  _ No, it’s too soon. He’d freak out and finding out I’m screwed up in the head is enough worry for one day. I’ll tell him later...maybe. If it’s gone, he’ll never have a reason to know. What’s passed has passed. _

“I wanted to confess my love.” She said, which was mostly the truth. She had planned on telling him briefly of her illness and that she was now free from it, but was thinking clearer now and decided it was a bit impulsive to do so.

A soft chuckle rumbled in Adrien’s chest. “How adorable.” He cooed and pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

“Shut it.” She murmured in reply, her cheeks warming; although, not unpleasantly.

“Never.” He said with another chuckle. “May I ask you on a proper date, mon cherie? I have the most lovely restaurant in mind and would love to commemorate our first day as a couple with the fanciest dinner this city can offer us.”

“How could I say no to that?” She asked, a soft snort of amusement following. “It’s not every day I get offered a free, expensive meal.”

“Ah, and when did I say I would pay?” He retorted with a grin, his tone light and joking. “I only pay when there is promise of reward later in the night.”

“Don’t push it.” She warned, far too intimidated by the insinuation of intimacy to find it amusing.

Adrien sat them up and pecked her cheek sweetly. “Fret not, mon amour. It was merely a joke. Your presence is reward enough, and I consider myself the luckiest man alive to be graced by it.”

Evelyn’s cheeks warmed and she looked away from him in embarrassment. “I do hope you haven’t fallen in love with the idea of me rather than who I actually am.” She said, genuinely afraid that such had happened.

“Nonsense! Do not think such lies.” He made her face him again and kissed her briefly. “I know who you actually are, for the most part, and I promise to find a way to love even the less pleasant parts about you.”

She nodded and hugged him, curling up in his lap. “We’ll see.”  
“Indeed we will.” He answered, wrapping his arms securely around her frail body.

The two of them spent the rest of the day cuddling, talking, and simply enjoying one another’s company. When evening came, Adrien ran home to change while Evelyn did her makeup and changed as well, and then he returned and took her on the loveliest date she had ever been on. He had insisted on getting the best wine at the restaurant, and of course did the exact same with their appetizer, main course, and dessert. He took her slow dancing as well, and Evelyn, for the first time in ages, was entirely carefree and happy, and had adored every moment of it. Adrien then took her home and escorted her to her doorstep, where he gave her the best kiss they had yet shared and of course, made a lewd joke that earned him a smack on the arm. Evelyn had smiled, regardless of her flushed cheeks. Even after he had gone home and she got ready for bed, she smiled. Today had been better than she had ever imagined her first day of knowing she was cancer free would be, and she couldn’t have been happier. As Evelyn laid in bed late that night, she grinned and bit her lip as she closed her eyes. She saw now that she had always had a future, and she knew it was going to be absolutely wonderful.


	12. Chapter Twelve

Evelyn silenced her alarm mere seconds after it chimed through her room, already having been awake for a solid twenty minutes. She got out of bed and glanced at the outfit she’d laid out on her chair the previous night; a simple black pantsuit with an elegant, cream colored top. A nervous flutter shivered through her and she chewed at the inside of her lip as she started to get ready.

She was going to photograph Ilaria and Ludwig’s wedding today, and she was extremely nervous. She had scoped out where the ceremony and reception would be held so she knew what to expect and what the lighting would be like, but she was still quite anxious. She hadn’t photographed an event like this in ages, and her worries wouldn’t leave her be.  _ What if I’ve lost my touch and they hate every shot? What if I mess up so badly that even heavy editing can’t fix the mistakes? I can fix the lighting and vibrancy, but I can’t go back and change the angle I took the photo at. What if- _

Evelyn took a deep breath and cleared her mind. This wasn’t helping her; quite the opposite. She needed to calm down and try to not let her anxieties get the best of her. Today was a very important day; it was her first job in a long while and it was a chance to get her career back on its feet after the long dry spell it suffered.

She took another breath and grabbed her phone to put on music to keep her mind occupied. She unlocked it, her worried frown melting into a broad smile when she saw she had a text from Adrien. She immediately opened it and grinned wider as she read it.

**_Good morning, my love. Good luck at your wedding today. I wish I could be there to help do whatever a photographer’s assistant would do. Don’t get too anxious. You will do wonderfully and all your worry will be for nothing, so save it for when you need it. Remember what I said the other day? Every time you get worried, tell yourself to save it for when you need it, because you never will need it, not as long as you keep telling yourself that. Well, you know how much I hate texting and it’s taken me fifteen minutes to type this all out, so I’ll conclude this now. I love you, Evelyn. - Adrien Meyer_ **

She giggled and sighed happily. God, he was so cute. He was so formal when he texted and she found it entirely adorable. She typed a reply, wanting to send one even though she knew he’d likely not reply to it.

**_I love you too darling. Good luck at your wedding too and give the guys and girls my love! See you tomorrow_ **

Ironically, Adrien had a wedding to attend that day, too. It wasn’t as uncommon as one would think, two weddings on the same day, especially not in a big city such as this one. She opened her music library and set her favorite song to play first, Mr. Blue Sky. She smiled as the song began and turned it up before starting to get ready.

She did her makeup first, deciding to go a little fancier than she usually did. She did eyeliner as well as eyeshadow, and picked a deep red lipstick instead of a pale gloss. After applying her fake eyelashes, she carefully got dressed and positioned her wig on her head. Her hair was beginning to grow back, though it was nowhere near a length she could comfortably leave the house without having it covered. She was putting weight back on, too, which was a welcome side effect of Adrien treating her to both restaurants and home cooked meals whenever he could. She was finally starting to look more like she had before her illness took over her, and that made her happier than words could say.

Evelyn made sure her wig was taped properly to her head, not wanting to cause a scene by having it become dislodged. She then went downstairs to fix up breakfast and pack a lunch, as well as triple check all her gear to make sure she had everything she’d need for the day.

Her thoughts drowned out her music as she sipped her tea and ate, her leg bouncing as she hoped with a furious desire that today would turn out all right. If it didn’t, it would crush her. Everything had finally started to go right, and if this didn’t, she’d know that none of it was true, that her life would fall apart again. She just wanted to have all the things that mattered sorted out, and this was the last thing on the list. She just hoped she wasn’t asking for too much.

* * *

“Big smiles!” Evelyn called out, grinning as well as Ilaria and Ludwig smiled. She snapped a few photos and looked at them briefly before feeling pride swell in her chest; she hadn’t lost her touch over the lengthy dry spell she’d had. She had dearly missed taking photos and was more than happy to be back to doing just that; there was a unique joy that photography brought her that she couldn’t seem to find anywhere else.

“Ludwig, could you bend Ilaria over and kiss her? Like they do in movies.” Evelyn said, moving her tripod a few feet closer.

Ludwig nodded and slid his hands around Ilaria’s tiny waist, giving her the most tender, loving smile before closing his eyes and kissing her. Evelyn’s heart nearly burst as she rapidly clicked her camera’s remote; the more photos, the better. She could already tell the photos were going to turn out wonderfully. She had a beautiful couple, wonderful weather, and lighting so perfect, she only had to set up one reflector.

Evelyn got a few different shots, so they’d have a variety, and before long, finished up. She took her camera off her tripod and walked over to show them a few of the photos.

“I got a lot, but we can take more if you aren’t satisfied with the ones I got.” She smiled and showed them a few of the better ones, really hoping they liked them.

Ilaria grinned and gushed at every single one she showed them, and even Ludwig nodded in approval a few times. She’d done well.

“They’re so beautiful!” Ilaria exclaimed, hugging Evelyn tightly. “Thank you so much, sweetie, we love them!”

Evelyn grinned and hugged her back briefly before letting go and shutting off her camera. “I should have them all edited and burned onto a DVD within three weeks, maybe more, depending on how many I have.”

“Thank you.” Ludwig said, nodding. “Are we done here?”

“We are.” She smiled and put her camera away into its bag. “And don’t you two worry about posing at the reception, all the ones I get there will be candid. Is there anything specific you want photographed?”

“The cake!” Ilaria grinned. “And the decorations, and our first dance. And Ludwig said he wanted some of us and his brother.”

“Will do.” Evelyn promised, packing away the rest of her gear. “Meet you two there? If you ask your driver to take a little bit of a longer route, I can get there before you two and snap some photos of you coming into the reception area.”

“I will.” Ludwig nodded. He took his bride’s hand and lead her away to the limousine, unable to hide how truly happy he was.

Evelyn smiled to herself as she finished gathering her things, her mind flooded with thoughts of Adrien for some silly reason she refused to let her thoughts linger on. Well, perhaps it wasn’t so silly of a reason, but she insisted on telling herself that as to not get her hopes up. They had only officially been a couple for a few weeks, which meant it was far too soon to be thinking of having a day like this with Adrien. Even so, that didn’t seem to matter to her brain. As she loaded her things into the taxi she rented and stared out the window as the driver took her to the reception, she daydreamed.

_ Has Adrien thought of me at the wedding he’s at? _ She wondered, her heart skipping a beat at the thought.  _ Has the thought of us getting married someday crossed his mind, too, or am I getting too ahead of myself? God, I hope it has. He’s all I could ever want and more. Please have let it cross his mind. Please have him feel the same way towards me as I feel towards him. _ She didn’t quite know who she was pleading to, but she desperately hoped that regardless of who heard her, her dreams would come true.

Before too long, the taxi pulled up to where the reception was being held. Evelyn paid the driver, got out all her things, and headed inside. No one paid her any heed, which she was grateful for; she hated feeling conspicuous at weddings. She didn’t waste time in snapping a few tester shots, picking the best flash to use.

After she was done, she barely had time to down half a water bottle before Ilaria and Ludwig arrived. She dashed to the spot she’d scoped out to get a clear shot and started taking photos of the newlyweds as they came into the reception area, smiling and waving to their friends and family. The moment was over quick enough and the two of them greeted a few guests before sitting at the head table to have lunch.

Evelyn took her things back over to where she had her gear all prepared for her and sat on the ground, taking a moment to catch her breath and relax. She had gotten a little stronger since she’d finished the last of her chemo treatment, but she still tired out quicker than a normal person would. She grabbed her little cooler she brought and ate half the sandwich she made, hoping it would help her feel less tired.

Evelyn considered herself lucky, others had it a lot worse than she did when it came to recovery. She only had the fatigue and occasional dry mouth, and though the former was a pain in the ass, she was used to dealing with it. She finished the rest of her water bottle and pulled another from the cooler to drink later; she disliked ice cold water. She yawned and double checked her hair and makeup to ensure that both still looked good. Relieved that she didn’t look awful, Evelyn then weeded through a few photos, deleting blurry ones or ones that had captured a blink. She smiled to herself, proud of what she had so far.

_ I truly am on the mend. _ She smiled to herself, surveying the matters of her health, love life, and now her career.  _ In every way. _

* * *

It wasn’t long after lunch when Ilaria excitedly waved Evelyn over, ready to take a photo with her husband and new brother-in-law. Evelyn rushed over, smile on her face and camera in hand. She looked up at the trio and blinked in surprise.

“Gilbert?” She asked, surprised to see the red eyed, silvery blond standing by the newlyweds.

Gilbert looked over and though surprised, grinned. “Evelyn! What the hell, you’re the photographer?”

“You two know each other?” Ludwig asked, raising a brow.

“Nope. Impromptu skit.” Gilbert snorted and rolled his eyes. “She’s Adrien’s girlfriend. We were talking about her at the rehearsal, remember?”

“She’s the one I told him to bring, but he couldn’t because she had to wor-” Ilaria gasped, looking mortified with herself. “I made you photograph our wedding instead of letting you come!”

“Firstly, you didn’t make me do anything.” Evelyn said quickly, not wanting to let the bride get upset on her wedding day. She smiled reassuringly and continued. “I am more than happy to photograph you two, this is the first job I’ve had in ages.”

“But I wanted you to come as a guest.” Ilaria said sadly.

“The wedding isn’t over yet.” Gilbert chimed in with a shrug. “If you really want her to come, you can just have her join in and ask your sister to take photos of the reception. Who really cares about professional reception photos, anyways? Everybody takes a bunch on their phone.”

Ilaria’s mood immediately brightened. “That’s perfect!”

Evelyn shifted on her feet and glanced between the three of them, a bit uncomfortable with the idea. “I really don’t mind continuing taking photos; it doesn’t feel right to leave a job half done.”

“But the ceremony and the formal photos were all that really mattered to us, photos of the reception were just a bonus.” Ilaria insisted. “Please celebrate with us, Evelyn? You’ve already worked so hard and the photos are so much better than I dreamed they’d be!”

“I really wouldn’t want to impose.”

“Impose?” Gilbert laughed out loud. “You couldn’t impose on Ilaria if you tried. Come on, you should join the party. Adrien won’t shut up about you. He’s right over there, see?”

Evelyn glanced to where Gilbert was pointing and immediately, her heart started pounding. Adrien was talking to Antonio, looking as beautiful as he always did, if not more. The suit he wore took her breath away, he looked so good in it, and his hair was tied back loosely, which left a few curls down to frame his face.

“You absolutely have to join the celebration.” Ilaria grinned, giving Evelyn a big hug. “We’d love to have you, right, Ludwig?”

“It does seem weird to make you keep working when you know Adrien and Gilbert.” Ludwig nodded in agreement.

Evelyn chewed on the inside of her cheek anxiously; she’d never been in a situation like this before and it was a bit uncomfortable. “You’re sure?”

“One hundred percent! Go put your camera down and get a drink, sweetheart!” Ilaria said happily. “Enjoy yourself and go give that man of yours a big kiss.”

Evelyn’s cheeks burned and she managed a small nod and a gracious thank you before being ushered toward Adrien by an insistent Gilbert.

“Hey, turn around, you dumb asshole.” The German snorted, tapping Adrien’s shoulder.

“Gilbert, I’m in the middle of a conversa-” Adrien looked a bit annoyed as he turned, but the frown disappeared into a shocked, delighted grin when he saw who stood next to Gilbert. “Evelyn?”

“Hey, you.” Evelyn said with a shy smile and a wave. “Small world, eh?”

Adrien beamed and swept her up into a big, tender hug. “You’re kidding me! You’re photographing Ludwig and Ilaria’s wedding?”

“I was, until Ilaria forced me to join the celebration.” She laughed a little and hugged him back.

“She’s such a darling, isn’t she? Ludwig is a lucky man.” He chuckled, letting Evelyn go to instead cup her cheek. “But not half as lucky as I am, I think.”

Evelyn felt her cheeks warm as she leaned into the gentle touch. “Oh, hush, you.”

“If you insist, my dear Evelyn.” Adrien hummed, a smile tugging at his lips as he leaned in and kissed her.

Evelyn returned the kiss willingly, though kept it chaste, despite Adrien’s subtle efforts to change that. She wouldn’t have minded a deep, passionate kiss if they were alone, but in public? She wouldn’t dare; she had no desire to draw attention to herself, nevertheless in such a raunchy way.

Adrien pulled away a few moments later, grinning. Evelyn smiled back without hesitation. God, how she loved seeing him happy.

“One second, I’m thinking of how much I miss you, and the next, I find that you are right behind me.” He brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “My love, can you get any more perfect?”

“There’s no need to flatter me, I’m already yours.” Evelyn answered, her cheeks once again pink. She was getting more used to flirting, but she had yet to shake off her shyness.

“Is that a promise?”

She nodded, which made him smile wider. The two of them hadn’t been officially dating for more than a few weeks, but each loved the other deeply and though Evelyn hadn’t been in many relationships, she didn’t need the experience to know that what she and Adrien had was no ordinary romance.

“Then you should know that I am yours as well.” Adrien murmured, speaking softly so she was the only one who could hear it. “Always and forever, until my last breath.”

Evelyn was taken aback by both his words and the sincerity of his tone, in the most wonderful of ways. It was all she could do not to kiss him right then and there.

“How the hell am I supposed to best that?” She asked with a flustered giggle.

“You best me in many ways that I cannot hope to compete with. Let me have this little win, hmm?” He teased, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

“Depends, what’s in it for me?” Evelyn loved the banter between the two of them; it was delightfully flirtatious and witty.

Adrien leaned in close, sending a shiver down her spine as he purred, “If you want, I’ll show you tonight, mon amour.”

Evelyn froze, not knowing how to react. Did he mean sex? She didn’t see what else he could mean. She was surprised, though not because she hadn’t thought of having it with him. She had, in moments she tried to pretend never happened and in her dreams as well, if the couple times she’d woken breathless with him on her mind were anything to go off. She’d indeed given it more than a little thought, but hearing an implication that he had as well was baffling. She was skin and bones, even despite her slight weight gain. Why would he want to have sex with her? God, she didn’t even know what to do. Would she even like it? She hadn’t in college, but maybe that was because her boyfriend at the time had no idea what he was doing and neither had she. Would things be different now? Shit, what if Adrien expected more from her than she could give? She knew a lot about sex, but knowledge and experience were very different things in this aspect. Was it too soon in their relationship to have sex? She didn’t know that either. Was there a certain amount of time that they should wait for it not to be considered improper? Did she care if there was? She wasn’t so sure she did, if she were being honest.

“Evelyn…?” Adrien’s voice drew her out from her thoughts and she realized that she hadn’t replied. He looked concerned.

“I, uh...sorry. Lost in thought.” She said, avoiding the topic in favor of having more time to mull it over.

“We don’t have to do a thing.” He assured her, his brow creased in worry as he took up one of her hands in his. “I take flirting too far too soon sometimes, I apologize.”

“No, no, you’re fine. It just took me by surprise.” Evelyn gave him a small smile, not wanting him to be upset. “I...maybe? I don’t know. Let me think about it, okay?”

“Don’t let what I said influence your decision. I’m more than willing to wait as long as you want to, even refrain from sex permanently if that’s what you want. I’m not with you because I want to have sex with you, I’m with you because I love you.” Adrien stared into her eyes as he spoke, wanting it to be absolutely clear that he was being serious about this.

Evelyn’s heart melted once more and she nodded, giving him a peck on the lips. “I love you, too. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, it’s human decency.” Adrien said, squeezing her hand and letting out a soft sigh. “Shall we sit?”

Evelyn nodded and followed him as he led her to the table he was seated at. Her heart was so full; Adrien was so good to her. She couldn’t have asked for a better man in her life, and was beyond grateful that he called her his own. Everything was going perfectly, and for the first time in a long time, Evelyn could confidently say that she was happy. Completely and truly happy.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who dislike smut and stuff, you should skip over this chapter entirely, as that's what most of it is. For those of you who like it, I hope it's halfway decent! Go easy on me, it's my first sex scene and I, myself am asexual, which made it even more difficult. ;p

Ilaria and Ludwig’s wedding had been the most beautiful one Evelyn had ever seen, and she enjoyed being a part of it more than she thought she would. Watching the newlywed couple cut the cake, dance, and smile at one another had been heartwarming on its own, but having Adrien at her side through it all only made it better. He showered her with affection and sweet little comments, some of them suggesting that they’d have a day like this someday. She had once been put off by any connotation of marriage, especially so soon in a relationship, but with Adrien, she found herself not only wonderstruck, but thinking similar things herself. Evelyn had never believed in true love or soulmates, but each day she spent with Adrien, she grew a little closer to changing her mind.

The wedding was coming to an end now. Most of the guests had left, leaving couple dozen people. The newlyweds were swaying to a slow, romantic song on the dancefloor, along with a few other couples, Adrien and Evelyn included. 

“You dance marvelously, mon amour.” Adrien murmured with a smile, his eyes closed as he rested his forehead against hers. “I don’t know what you were talking about earlier.”

“Was just being cautious; I didn’t want you to get your hopes up.” She smiled and closed her eyes as well as they slowed their dancing so they just stood there, embracing one another tenderly.

“Mm.” He hummed in reply and traced little patterns across her back with his fingertips.

Evelyn relaxed into his touch and reveled in the comfort of his arms. “We should get going, it’s late.”

“But I’m not ready to let you go yet.”

“Maybe you don’t have to.” She whispered, her cheeks warming a little.

Evelyn had given Adrien’s suggestion a lot of thought and found no reason to wait to make love with him. She wanted to, she loved him, and he had already expressed that he wasn’t dating her to get in her pants. When she looked on a calendar, it seemed so short a time, but when she looked at her heart? It felt like she’d loved him forever.

“Wait, what?” He pulled away enough to look at her, a brow arched in confusion.

Evelyn’s bravery faltered a bit, but she prevailed. “What you mentioned this afternoon….”

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to.” Adrien said immediately, leading her away from the dancefloor as to not get in anyone’s way as they talked. “I meant what I said. I’m not with you for sex, and I will wait until you want to-”

“That’s what I’m saying, Adrien.” She interrupted before she lost her nerve. “I want to. I thought about it, and I want to.”

He nodded slowly and then pecked her lips. “Who am I to deny the woman I love?” He teased and gave her another kiss.

She pulled away after a moment or two and smiled a bit shyly. “Should we get going, then?”

“Mm, it is getting late, yes.” He said, glancing at his friends, who still swayed romantically with their partners. “Let’s slip out. I’d hate to disrupt them.”

“Agreed.” Evelyn said, walking with him to their table to get her camera. They’d taken all her other gear to Adrien’s car earlier, not wanting to have to haul it all back at the end of the night. She turned it on and took a moment to snap a few photos of Ilaria and Ludwig as they danced. Despite being told she didn’t have to photograph the rest of the wedding, she had anyways. She wanted to earn the money they paid her, and she wanted them to have a variety of photos.

“Ready?” She asked, shutting off her camera and tucking it safely away in its bag.

“Mhm.” Adrien said, taking her hand and leading her out to the parking lot. “Did you enjoy yourself?” He asked, opening the passenger door for her.

“I did, very much. Did you?” She asked, getting in as she thanked him for his courtesy.

“Of course I did. Even moreso after you arrived.” He shut the door and got in the driver’s side. He started driving and reached for her hand the second they left the parking lot, as he always did.

“Gilbert’s speech was surprisingly sweet. I didn’t expect it to be half as mushy as it was.” She chuckled.

“He acts all cool and tough, but Gilbert’s really a big softie. He cried while writing it.” He smiled. “And of course firmly denied it after.”

She laughed again. “He seems very odd.”

“Oh, he is. One of the weirdest people I’ve ever met. But that’s what makes him who he is.”

“Mm.” She moved her hand a little and started making circles with her thumb on his palm and said quietly, “I love you.”

“And I love you, my dear Evelyn.” He replied.

She could see his face brighten up in the dim light of the streetlamps, and it made her heart soar. She could always see how much he loved her in the way he smiled when she told him things like that, so she had started being more liberal with her affections. Before him, she never had been that eager to express her emotions, but now, she did it whenever she felt brave enough to.

The two of them sat in silence as Adrien drove, each one savoring the peaceful moment. Evelyn’s mind soon drifted to less innocent things, remembering what they’d be doing after they got to her house. She was looking forward to it, of course, but even so, the worries remained. Would she be good enough for him? She had little experience, and from what she’d heard from the guys, it certainly wasn’t the same case with Adrien. It was hard not to envy the people he’d been with in the past, but she was trying her best not to think of it. She just hoped he wouldn’t be thinking of any of them while they were between the sheets.

All too soon and after far too long, Adrien pulled into Evelyn’s driveway and squeezed her hand. “We’re here, mon cherie. Are you absolutely sure you want me to join you inside? It isn’t too late to change your mind if you’re unsure.”

“Adrien, I’m sure.” She said, squeezing his hand back before letting go and getting out of the car. She was beginning to wonder if he even wanted to. He just kept asking if she was sure, and it seemed to her like he wanted her to say she wasn’t. Had he been joking when he first implied it…? It hadn’t seemed like it, but he could’ve been. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d misinterpreted something someone said.

Evelyn was starting to worry as they walked to her door and she unlocked it. She’d have to ask him, even if there was a possibility of being humiliated by his reply. She opened the door and the two of them walked inside. She set down her camera bag and her keys and took a breath.

She was just about to speak when her lips were otherwise occupied; Adrien was kissing her. It was so intense and heated that it melted her worries away instantly, leaving her breathless and craving more when he broke away for air.

“Do you have any idea how hard it was to keep my hands off you on the drive here?” He murmured against her lips, his hot breath mingling with her own.

Evelyn bit her lip, finding that she really, really liked how he sounded like this. “We’re not driving here anymore.”

Adrien smiled and picked her up bridal style, kissing her cheek. “Indeed we’re not.” He hummed, carrying her upstairs and to the bedroom.

Her heart was pounding, her blood racing through her veins as he nudged the door shut, turned on the light, and proceeded to sit her carefully on the bed, as if she were made of glass. He removed both of their shoes, not wanting to have to pause things later to do so, and immediately sat beside her and kissed her again. Evelyn sighed and let her arms wind around him as she shifted to sit in his lap instead, needing to be closer. Adrien slid his tongue into her mouth and held her tighter as she returned the intimate kiss. The two continued like that for as long as they could, breaking away only to drink in proper breaths.

“God, you’re intoxicating.” Adrien whispered against her jaw, peppering it with sweet little kisses.

Evelyn sighed and let her head fall to the side a little, giving him better access. “As if you aren’t as well. I couldn’t get my mind off you all day, and I think you know what I was thinking.”

“And if I don’t?” He purred teasingly, nipping at her earlobe.

She giggled, finding it more ticklish than arousing. “Take a guess.”

“Why don’t you show me instead?” He murmured against her neck, then suckled at a pulse point.

She moaned and shifted her hips down and forward, grinding against him. As much as she loved the attention to her neck, her lips needed it more right then, and she made sure he knew that by pulling him into a passionate kiss. Adrien returned it immediately, his breath hitching in his throat at the sinful little gyrations of her hips. His own bucked into hers as he worked on getting her top off, eager to play with those perfect little breasts of hers.

Evelyn pulled away from the kiss and helped him, pausing the movements of her hips to work on the buttons of his shirt. He’d taken his tie and suit coat off earlier that evening, which she was glad for now; less layers between them to take off.

“Do you have any condoms?” She asked, tossing the shirt away and biting her lip at the sight of what lay beneath it. He was perfect. Utterly perfect.

“In my wallet.” He said, smiling as Evelyn pushed him to lay down on the mattress and rested on her elbows above him.

“Good.” She whispered against his lips, running a hand over the hard muscles on his chest. His skin was impossibly soft and she’d be lying if she said she didn’t want to feel every last inch of it.

His hands slid around Evelyn’s body to cup her ass as she groped his chest. It was by no means large, but Adrien didn’t seem to have complaints as he squeezed and gripped it.

She pushed back against his hands and sucked at spot just below his collarbone, but not hard enough to leave a mark. They hadn’t talked about that yet, so for all she knew, he could dislike hickeys. She kissed up his neck and across his jaw until their lips met once more, letting her hips sink down until they were pressed flush to Adrien’s again. He groaned softly into her mouth and gripped her ass a little harder as he rolled his hips against hers.

Evelyn moaned and pulled away after a bit, aching to be touched more than she was. “You can take my bra off if you want.”

A small puff of air passed through his lips and he did just that, tossing the piece of clothing away. He gave her chest a long, lustful stare and then cupped one of her breasts.

“It’s as if God made you specifically for me. Your breasts are the most perfect ones I’ve ever seen.” He squeezed gently, causing Evelyn to arch into the touch.

“You like smaller ones?” She asked, smiling.

He nodded. “They’re much more sensitive and I love how they fit in my hands.”

She smiled wider, finding it both arousing and adorable how enamored with her he was. She climbed off him to instead pull him on top of her. “Have at it, love.”

Adrien kissed her heatedly as he squeezed and toyed with her breasts, gently pinching her nipples every so often. She gasped and moaned against his lips, the ache between her thighs growing as he touched her. She could already feel how wet she was getting and wondered how hard Adrien had grown. She was considering reaching a hand down and checking for herself when he started kissing down her neck and to her chest.

“God….” She breathed out as he closed his mouth around one of her nipples and sucked.

Adrien hummed and continued, switching to the other once it had grown hard. Evelyn squirmed a little below him, trying to rub her thighs together for some blessed friction. She needed him closer, this wasn’t enough.

“Adrien..” She murmured impatiently.

He pulled away and glanced up at her, his cheeks flushed slightly in arousal. “Tell me what you want, mon amour.” He purred, running his hands up and down her sides.

She shivered, goosebumps of pleasure rising to meet his fingertips. “I want you. I want more.”

“Are you comfortable with being given oral?” He asked, giving her breasts another squeeze before unbuttoning her pants and pulling them down.

Evelyn nodded, her cheeks flushing with a sudden shyness. Her heart was pounding again and she just wanted things to move on already. She wanted him as close as he could possibly be.

Adrien turned his gaze to what lay between her legs as he pulled her underwear down and tossed it away, exhaling slowly. He liked what he saw, judging by his expression. He looked back at Evelyn’s face and moved up so he could chase away any insecurities she had with a kiss. It was slow and thorough, and she lost herself completely in it. Adrien’s kiss was so gratifying, yet she knew she could never get enough of it.

“You’re beautiful. Absolutely perfect.” He murmured against her lips.

“I love you.” She answered, hazy in the most blissful of ways.

He said the phrase back to her, but she barely remembered hearing it, as that was when he pressed his fingers against her and started moving them in a slow circle. Evelyn gasped, her legs falling open as a tingly pleasure shot through her nerves.

Adrien watched her as her face contorted, his eyes bearing an intensity that only served to arouse her more. He sped up his movements, eager to hear more of those tiny moans she couldn’t hold back. Evelyn groaned, her hands curling into fists around the sheets.

He stopped before long, wanting to give her the best he had to offer. He moved down her body, kissing and licking as he went, until he was laying on his chest between her legs, each one over either of his shoulders. Evelyn was panting as she looked down at him, her breath stolen away from her once more as Adrien closed his eyes and kissed her in the most intimate place he could.

“Fuck!” Evelyn cried out, barely able to stop herself from bucking into him. The curse spurred him into action and he gave her a long, slow lick, massaging her thighs and watching her reactions. She cried out again, her eyes closing as her head leaned back reflexively. She’d never felt a pleasure like this before, and with just barely a taste, she was already addicted.

Adrien smiled against her and suckled at her clit, clearly reveling in the cry that followed the action. Her hips bucked against his face of their own volition and he let out a moan. Pleasuring his partners in bed was incredibly arousing to him, and he found out rather quickly that it was especially true with Evelyn.

It didn’t take long for her to near her end. One of her hands had wound into Adrien’s hair, pushing him further against her as she cursed and moaned his name.

“Don’t stop, don’t st- fuck!” She cried, the coiling in her abdomen exploding in a wonderful rush of pleasure. She convulsed and trapped his head with her thighs before she relaxed and panted, utterly speechless.

Adrien sat up and wiped his mouth before taking her breath away again in a passionate kiss. She could taste herself on his tongue, but she found that she didn’t care much at all, she’d kiss him regardless.

“My god….” He groaned against her lips. “That was fantastic.”

“Shouldn’t I be saying that?” She let out a breathless laugh, still feeling like she was up in the clouds. “You’re fucking- god, you’re good at that.”

“I can do it again if you like.” Adrien purred, already moving downwards again.

“Get back here, you.” She protested, guiding him back up to her lips. She definitely wouldn’t say no another time, but right now, she needed him. The afterglow of her orgasm had turned into a desperate want for more. It had blown her mind, don’t get her wrong, but she wanted him inside her. She needed him inside her.

As he deepened the kiss, she reached between them and squeezed him gently through his pants, trying to hint at her growing impatience. He moaned into the kiss and pressed against her hand eagerly, the lack of attention down there making him all the more desperate for her touch. Evelyn broke the kiss and squeezed him again.

“I think we’d best get these off.”

“God, do I agree.” He said breathlessly, climbing off her to take care of that problem.

He got out a condom from his wallet before taking off both his pants and boxers in one smooth movement, and it was Evelyn’s turn to gape. From his head to his toes, he was perfect. The subtle hints of a six pack, the golden curls cascading down the sides of his face, the trail of hair leading down to his well endowed cock; all of it. She could hardly believe he was hers.

Evelyn didn’t have to tell him to get back on top of her, he got the message from the way she was looking at him and was more than willing to oblige. She kissed him as she ran her hands over every inch of him she could reach, before finally settling on his erection. She wrapped her hand around it and stroked him slowly, shivering in arousal when she heard the choked moan the action drew from him.

Adrien cursed against her lips, murmuring words she didn’t understand. He was speaking French, and god, did that only make her want him more. She started pumping him, eager to hear him.

“God, Evelyn. God, yes.” He bucked into her hand, his breath hitching.

“I need you.” She gasped, the ache between her thighs almost unbearable now.

That was all Adrien needed to hear. He, although reluctantly, pulled away from her and grabbed the condom, taking it out of the package before rolling it onto himself. He climbed over her again and cupped the side of her face, stroking her cheek with his thumb.

“Are you absolutely sure?” He asked, staring into her eyes. His gaze was so serious. Evelyn knew that he would stop if she asked him to, and she loved him for it.

“Without a shred of doubt.” She said, a little desperately. “Adrien, please. I need you.”

He nodded and kissed her once more before positioning them properly. Him above her, and her legs on either side of his. He held her hips in his hands as he slowly eased into her, his his head falling into her shoulder as he exhaled in pleasure. Evelyn bit her lip and locked her legs around him and pushed him in the rest of the way. She’d missed that feeling a lot more than she realized.

Tears formed in her eyes as she wrapped her arms around him, holding him as close as she could. She loved him more than she could ever hope to express, and having him against and inside her like this only made her realize just how deep those feelings ran. It was overwhelming in the most intimate of ways.

“Are you okay…?” Adrien asked, sounding worried.

“I’m more than okay.” She whispered, a bit choked up. She loosened her arms enough to look at him. “Being with you like this...it’s….”

“I know.” He cupped her cheek again, his eyes full of adoration. “I know, mon amour. I feel it, too.”

She kissed him slowly and Adrien returned it in kind as he pulled out and pressed back into her. She clung tighter to him as he repeated the motion and before long, had to break the kiss to gasp for breath. He was hitting her in all the right spots, and it took the air straight from her lungs.

“God, Adrien.” She whimpered into his shoulder, bucking her hips against him.

He groaned and didn’t keep her wanting more for long. A hand found her breast and he gradually sped up his pace, causing them both to gasp and moan with every few thrusts. Pleasure shot up Evelyn’s spine with each roll of Adrien’s hips and she did her best to reciprocate by clenching around him. It took a bit of concentration, but the cry it roused from his lips made it absolutely worth the effort.

“Faster, ple-please.” She said, needing more.

Adrien complied immediately, his hips snapping forward into hers with more intensity. She cried out and grabbed his shoulders, needing to hold onto something. She could tell that he wasn’t going to last too much longer, not with how his thrusts were slowly growing more erratic. He was breathing heavily and moaning deep in his throat every so often, too, and it was driving her insane in the best way. He sounded better than anything she’d ever heard.

“God- Evelyn, I’m close.” He groaned, letting go of her breast to instead reach between them and start rubbing at her clit.

“Fuck, fuck.” She cursed, bucking against him. “Fuck, yes! Please, don’t stop. God! Don’t stop.”

Adrien did the opposite of stopping. He sped up his thrusts and rubbed her faster, crying out in pleasure as his release drew nearer. Evelyn dug her nails into his back, cursing and moaning as her second orgasm built up inside her.

“Shit-” He cursed loudly and let out a choked cry of bliss as he came, his hips snapping into her once more, burying himself deep.

The sound of his climax brought on her own and she arched against him with a near scream of pleasure, her nails raking down his back in what was without a doubt the best orgasm she’d ever had. She whimpered his name as she came down from her high, shaking and more satisfied than she’d ever felt in her life.

Adrien was the first to speak, still pressed up against her and holding her close. “I love you.” He whispered into her ear, kissing the shell of it.

“I love you, too.” She murmured in reply, unlocking her legs around him. God, were they sore now. She shouldn’t have had them like that the whole time.

He pulled out of her with a soft sigh and dealt with the condom. He hurried into the bathroom before returning with a damp towel.

“Being sticky isn’t good for sleeping.” He said, parting her legs to wipe away the fluids that had gotten smeared around.

Evelyn watched him, her heart melting once again. “Do you want to stay the night?”

“Of course I do. If that’s all right with you?” He glanced up at her, his cheeks rosy in his post-sex glow.

“It’s more than all right with me.” She smiled and sat up as he finished up.

In addition to sleeping with him, she’d dreamt of sleeping beside him. She pulled him close and kissed him, but found that they both were smiling too much to continue the kiss.

“That was fantastic.” She giggled, playing with his hair.

Adrien grinned and tossed the towel away to instead hug her, his heart full. “It was okay, I guess.”

“Shut it, you git. It was far more than ‘okay’ and you know it.” She couldn’t help a laugh; he was so charming.

“Of course it was. It was you and me, how could it not be? Everything about me is fantastic.” He hummed, nuzzling his face into the crook of her neck affectionately.

“Hush, you.” She rolled her eyes with a smile and yawned. “You’re an idiot.”

“Ah, yet you love me anyway.”

“Do I, now? Getting a bit cocky, I see.”

“Oh, you’d know all about that now, wouldn’t you, cherie?” He chuckled, teasing her with a little nip to her neck.

“Adrien William Meyer!” She exclaimed, barely holding back a laugh.

He merely giggled. “Mhm?”

“You know. Watch it, you.”

“Is it too bold to say ‘make me’?”

“You tell me.”

“I’m going to be safe and say...no.” He chuckled again, moving to peck her lips.

She shook her head and beamed at him. “Git. Come on, let’s get under the covers. It’s cold and I’m tired.”

“Sounds marvelous, mon amour.” He kissed her once more and the two of them crawled under the covers after he shut off the light.

Evelyn had just started to reach for the pillow she always hugged at night, but paused. She didn’t have to hug it tonight, not with a living, breathing person to cuddle with. She grinned wider and happily snuggled closer to Adrien. The two of them fell asleep rather quickly, after they finished talking, of course. They stayed up for a good forty minutes whispering to one another in the dark. They didn’t talk about anything important, just little, nonsensical things, and Evelyn wouldn’t have had it any other way. Today had been the best day she’d had in a while, and it couldn’t have ended more perfectly.

**Author's Note:**

> Just to get it out there, I apologize if the portrayal of Evelyn's condition, treatment, ect. aren't 100% accurate. I don't want it to seem like I'm downplaying the pain of people battling cancer; that is in no way my intention. I've done research and have written it as accurately as I can, without going into great detail and interrupting the flow of the story.  
> I hope you enjoyed chapter one! I won't be leaving many notes, so let me say now that comments/reviews are more than welcome! (: I'd love to read what you think of Contend if you have the time! Thank you for reading~!  
> \- Rae Sedona


End file.
